Sylvia

A month ago, I happened across Sylvia’s Myspace. Sylvia is the girl who I looted a 7-Eleven with in 1993. We went our separate ways later that year and haven’t talked since then, except the occasional prank calls Zak and I would make to her in the mid 90’s. So I sent her a message. It went like this:

Wow, Sylvia on Myspace! It’s good to see you. Looks like you’re doing great. I wonder if you hate me. Or even remember me. If you don’t wanna write back, I understand and I won’t bug you anymore. But…hi! :)

Brad

The next day, I receive a reply from her. Here it is:

hi ok there is no way i can ever forget you as much as i wish i could i can’t cause you was a big part of my life for some time do i hate you no i don’t cause that would take up too much of my time and energy do i wish you would forget me yes i am married to a wonderful man with kids he knows nothing of you or what my life was like back then i’m not trying to be rude or mean i’ve made peace with my life and would like to keep it that way and yes after many years of therapy i can say that i am at peace with everything that went on in my younger days i’ve grew up and changed i’m a respected person in my comunity now i wish you no ill harm or want anything bad for you i hope you have a happy and fullfilling life and i hope that you find some meaningfull and lasting joy i also do not hold you responsible for anything that may of happened in our past i have let go of my grudges and as far as bugging me i can’t say that you did it was just a big shock to hear from you after all these years so ok now i wrote you back and i hope you understand i had to get that out and off my chest

Is she saying she went through therapy because of me? Her giant paragraph is kind of hard to understand. How is it that somebody who spends all their free time reading books can be a complete failure at grammar, spelling, punctuation, and even paragraphs? Colleen’s the same way, reads nonstop but fucks up constantly with simple writing. I can understand someone writing like that if they never read. But I’m talking about complete bookworms! I’m not trying to put her down, just seems strange to me.

I wrote her back one more time…

Hi again. I’m guessing you’d prefer not to keep in touch then. That’s cool with me. I was just searching for random old friends on Myspace last night and happened across your profile. I wasn’t trying to upset you, I just enjoy catching up with people from my past. I’m happy to hear everything is going well for you! If you ever change your mind and want to do some catching up, I’ll be here.

Brad

I think it’s crazy that she’s married to a guy and has kids, but hasn’t told him about her past. You’d think that robbing a 7-Eleven, spending a couple weeks in jail, and then spending a couple years on probation for it would be worth mentioning to someone you’re in a relationship with. Me and her were together for an entire year, and we traveled the country together! The reason she even lives in the state that she lives in now is because I helped her find her birth mother and brother. They even met me! Did she tell them to keep quiet about me?

Every girlfriend I’ve had has known about all my previous long-term relationships. And they’ve known about the 7-Eleven incident. You can’t just leave out a giant chunk of your life like that. Especially if it’s interesting! We hitchhiked, flew on stolen credit cards, spent months in a college dorm, explored Hollywood together, had jobs together, spent time in the back of police cars together!

Back in 1995, it’d been at least a year since I’d spoken with Sylvia. Out of nowhere, she calls and leaves a message on the PLA voicemail number in Texas. But she doesn’t say she’s Sylvia. Instead she claims she’s the cousin of some kids we used to take care of in Highland, Illinois. She tells me that a couple of them were in a horrible car accident and that they were in the hospital and burned really bad. Her voice was unmistakable.

The next day I called around to a few hospitals to see if it was true. As far as I could tell, it wasn’t. I’d been pranked. I could only assume that she was retaliating because Zak and I had been harassing her friend Chris Tomkinson for the past year and a half. So I tracked her down quite easily. Me and Zak harassed her until she eventually changed her number and/or moved. A month later I tracked her down again and the process repeated several times over the next year. By 1996 we quit and I never heard from her again, until last month. It’s not like it was unprovoked harassment, though!

Jammie says I should clue her husband in on Sylvia’s past. And as hilarious of a thought that is, I’m not going to do it. I wonder what else Sylvia’s husband doesn’t know about. I wonder if he even knows that she had a couple kids when she was 14 that she gave up for adoption. That’d be nuts not to tell your husband that. I bet she hasn’t. I should track down the kids and set up a reunion on Maury!