PLA Forums
Other Stuff That Has Little To Do With PLA => General Discussions => Topic started by: MattGSX on December 07, 2006, 01:12:27 PM
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I don't know if anyone ever saw the ChaCha search engine, where you can get a paid guide to help you search the Internet.
They can sometimes be most unhelpful:
Search terms: How to dismantle an atomic bomb
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: CC
CC: Welcome to ChaCha!
CC: I appreciate your patience while I find exactly what you need.
You: No problem. For clarification, I need to find how to dismantle an atomic bomb, NOT the U2 album by the same name.
CC: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.
Though sometimes they can be just as fun as a relay operator.
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: ElizaG
ElizaG: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi Eliza. Another guide just disconnected me. I'm taking some courses in civil defense and need to find an onlne, comprehensive guide on dismantling bombs should the worst ever happen, but all I'm getting is info on U2's last CD.
ElizaG: let me see what I can find for you..
You: Cool. Thanks
You: I can't remember, but atomic weapons are pretty much always fatal, right?
ElizaG: yes..I am pretty sure they are..
You: Are you having any luck finding anything on disarming them?
ElizaG: no...same thing you came up with
You: Fabulous. The militias are rising, Eliza. The streets aren't safe anymore. I'd find someone who has a fall-out shelter in case things come to a boiling point.
You: Especially now that we know U2 has ruined our chances on ever finding out how to disarm a bomb.
You: Can you find me distributors for fall-out shelters in the Midwest?
(about a minute silence)
ElizaG: let me see what I can find for you...
You: great.
You: I'd prefer something in Wisconsin, but Michigan or even Iowa wouldn't be the end of the world...
You: assuming I got there before then.
(2 minutes silence)
You: So, do you do this job from home, or how does that work?
ElizaG: from home
You: That's nice. Does it pay well?
ElizaG: decent
You: That's nice. Well, I only have a few more minutes before my civil defense class, so I'm going to take off.
You: Take care. Trust nobody.
You: Thanks, I'm done.
Status: Session ended.
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lets see what they say when I search for PLA related stuff!
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This service rules! I searched for gay monkey porn and this is what I got:
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: EmilyS
EmilyS: Welcome to ChaCha!
EmilyS: Well well well.
EmilyS: The FBI may want to know about this.
You: I need gay monkey porn IMMEDIATELY!
You: Hurry, PLEASE, Emily!
EmilyS: Well, alright.
You: Just make sure it's GAY monkey porn, okay?
EmilyS: So like, let's be specific
EmilyS: Do you want monkeys that are the same gender doing the nasty?
You: Definitely
You: The more graphic, the better
EmilyS: What if they're different species of monkey?
EmilyS: What if they're baboons?
EmilyS: Can you tell the difference?
You: Oh hell no. I want American monkeys!
You: Call me racist if you must
You: I just don't fly that way.
She sends me a link for a gay monkey. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2oEhjMwhKq4)
You: Wow, thanks Emily!
You: This will be perfect!
EmilyS: I am here to serve
You: You wanna get together sometime and look at gay monkey porn?
EmilyS: Sadly, monkeys are not my thing.
You: Oh. Well, doesn't hurt to ask.
EmilyS: That's alright.
You: Thanks so much!
EmilyS: Different strokes for different folks
EmilyS: As the saying goes
EmilyS: :D
You: Have a super day!
EmilyS: You too :)
EmilyS: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
Status: Session ended.
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They all work out of home on their own time, so they're pretty slow to report abuse. The last search companion I've had has never reported anything, but has refused several searches (this isn't the convo I posted).
They don't seem to be the most helpful, though. I applied to be a search companion, and I'm really hoping they contact me about it, because that'd be sweet.
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I did a search for Phone Losers of America...
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: sherric
sherric: Welcome to ChaCha!
sherric: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
You: Great!
sherric: what can I help you find?
You: the Phone Losers of America
You: they hax0red me
sherric: do you know the name of the phone company?
You: It's not a phone company. They're an elite band of underground computer hax0rs, hell-bent on destroying my credit and social life.
You: They must be stopped!
You: I need the leader's home address and phone number too.
You: And his cell phone and social security number, if possible.
You: I'm going to make late-night prank calls to him
You: That'll show that scoundrel
sherric: I cant get all his personal information, but here are 3 links for you
You: Okay, I suppose that'll do
sherric: Are these results sufficient?
You: I'll use this to smash their empire
You: Yes, thank you very much!
sherric: Is there anything else on this topic I can find for you today?
You: No thanks
sherric: Thanks for using ChaCha! I hope you had a great search experience!
sherric: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
Status: Session ended.
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Live Guide Now is disabled because you have been involved in a possible abusive action. Our abuse alert is set at a low threshold to protect our visitors and guides.
If you feel that you have received this message in error, please e-mail us at abuse_resolution@chacha.com with a request for re-entry to our site.
We appreciate your feedback. Thank you.
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Just for searching for hard core child pornography. What jerks! Google wouldn't treat me like this.
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I like the "Please RATE ME" part.
I wish more women would say that.
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Serarch: scrotum medical surgery
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: JacquelineC
JacquelineC: Welcome to ChaCha!
JacquelineC: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
You: Hi I need help
You: I have to find sometghing
You: som webpage that explain medical procedures
You: I have had an accident here
JacquelineC: What type?
You: um.
You: well I kind of
You: this is embarassing
JacquelineC: uhuh
You: but I hurt my balls
JacquelineC: And you can type?
You: I dont want to go to the hospital
You: yes
You: i use my hands to typre
JacquelineC: Not if you hurt there because thats where your hands would be now
You: i need to know how to stitch a wound
You: i'mmn using one hand
You: please hurry
JacquelineC: Stapler or crazy glue
You: please tjhis is not funny
You: hurts
JacquelineC: Clean the stapler with alcohol first
You: plese find me a dopctor webpage
JacquelineC: No I can not give any medical treatments over the internet , I won't be liable
You: pleeease
You: just find me a page
JacquelineC: Call a doctor
You: can you find me one/
JacquelineC: If you can type you can find your own medical procedures
JacquelineC: No man I know would stitch that up himself so no I don't believe you.
You: i dont have insurense
JacquelineC: So they can bill you
JacquelineC: later
JacquelineC: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.
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I like the "Please RATE ME" part.
I wish more women would say that.
A man has to be pretty confident to post a quote of himself making his previous post.
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It was a mistake--a double post
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to Panic:
Dude, that was the greatest thing I've ever read. I think I'm actually crying.
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I probably got banned after this, but whatever. I think it was one of my better ones.
Search subject: Cooking with children
Are these results sufficient?
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Guide not located.
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: LoriM
LoriM: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: HI
LoriM: Hi!
You: I'm trying to find a good guide for cooking with children.
LoriM: I can help you
LoriM: let me get you some information
You: Cool. I'd want some recipes, safety precautions, the works.
You: Sure thing.
LoriM: You got it....one moment
You: let me look at that while I still have you on.
You: Can you hold for a moment?
LoriM: the results will stay
LoriM: even after we are finished
LoriM: let me get you one more
You: Cool.
LoriM: Are these results sufficient?
LoriM: Or would you like a few more?
You: Could you do one more search that's also food related?
LoriM: sure
You: I need a guide on maximizing stove capacity.
You: My stove is so small, I can only fit like, 2, 3 kids in it, tops
LoriM: let me see waht I can find
You: *chickens, not kids
LoriM: Ok.........gotcha
LoriM: just another moment please
You: yeah. I'm guessing I wouldn't even be able to fit one kid in my stove. I've never tried, though
LoriM: Are you looking to buy a new stove?
You: If I need to. Do you think the store will let me bring my kids along, to see if they can all fit in there.
You: ?
You: Just in case.
LoriM: ok
LoriM: right
LoriM: Have a nice day
You: Wait
You: I'm not planning on cooking them or anything
You: They just need to know the option is always there.
LoriM: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.
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One woman who takes her job too seriously.
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: CadyD
CadyD: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi Cady!
CadyD: Hi! How can I help you today?
You: I need to find out what the legal grounds are to have a business press charges for "abuse of services"
CadyD: OK, let me see what I can find for you!
CadyD: Still searching...
You: That's fine.
You: I know at one point I was able find something with the search phrase PLA abuse of services
You: maybe if you tried that?
CadyD: Ok, I will try that, thanks.
You: Hm... Cady, you seem really nice, so I have to come clean on something.
CadyD: Hmm, that isn't working, I am getting a lot of results on drug abuse or abuse in general
You: A bunch of friends all had conversations with other Guides and posted them, coz they were friggin' hilarious, and I added that phrase to the page, hoping that you'd find it, and read some of the conversations.
CadyD: Would you like me to transfer you to a guide who may help you better?
You: Would you like to read the page?
CadyD: No, thank you, I don't find pranks against ChaCha funny
You: Okay
CadyD: Thanks for using ChaCha!
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Last one for a while, I promise
Search field: Bypassing IP blocks
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: TashaW
TashaW: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: HI
TashaW: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
You: TashaW: Welcome to ChaCha!. The extra "hi" is redundant, since you have an automated greeting
TashaW: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: DavidR
DavidR: Welcome to ChaCha!
DavidR: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: JosephS
JosephS: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi Joseph
JosephS: Good evening.
JosephS: How can I help you today?
You: I'm trying to find a way to mask my IP address, or change, it, or something
JosephS: Thanks for coming to ChaCha! Give me a moment while I do all your searching for you!
You: sure
You: Those aren't QUITE it
JosephS: Thanks for being patient! Rest assured I'm finding the most relevant results for your search.
You: Say someone were to IP ban me for "abuse of services" or something silly like that. I need to find out how to get PAST that
You: Joseph, is there a Guide rated as a computer whiz, or is that you?
JosephS: You know what, you are pretty lucky that I'm even helping you with this problem of yours. If your banned, it's for a reason.
JosephS: I appreciate your patience while I find exactly what you need.
You: You're right, I'm sorry
JosephS: Thank you, now let me find it for you, because I assume no one else will.
You: I don't know about THAT. I could always just present it differently, like I was studying up on network security and need to know what vulnerabilities my security measures have.
JosephS: You could, so if you want to, ask me to transfer you.
You: Nah
You: You're doing a good job
JosephS: thanks
You: Unless you'd prefer to transfer me. That's okay
JosephS: Naw, I'm interested too.
You: Well, i'm going to get a coke while you look.
JosephS: Sure, no problem.
JosephS: The last one should be exactly what you need.
JosephS: I tried to find some free ones for you, but they are far and beyond.
JosephS: Are these results sufficient?
You: Hmm... that's pretty good
JosephS: Is there anything else on this topic I can find for you today?
You: That's it, I'll be sure to try that next time a Guide bans me
JosephS: Thanks for using ChaCha! I hope you had a great search experience!
JosephS: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
Status: Session ended.
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Search on "pranks on chacha guides"
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: MarrianneP
MarrianneP: Welcome to ChaCha!
MarrianneP: pranks r us...how may I help you?
You: Hi! Was just looking for some good pranks to pull on chacha guides
You: I found this one, which is funny: http://www.phonelosers.org/forums/index.php?topic=882.msg8878;topicseen#new
You: wasn't sure if there's more
MarrianneP: well, there certainly are
MarrianneP: I'll send you some
You: great, thanks!
MarrianneP: well, that should giv you a couple nights good reading!
You: great, thanks so much!
MarrianneP: be sure to look for me in those pages
MarrianneP: I've been featured a few times
You: I'll do my best. It'll be like knowing a celebrity!
MarrianneP: My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself....exactly
You: Bye Marrianne
MarrianneP: you have a great night
You: you too
MarrianneP: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
Status: Session ended.
Here's the links she gave me:
http://forum.abestweb.com/showthread.php?s=218fa33d2963385788fccdb8533d0e0b&p=634308#post634308 (http://forum.abestweb.com/showthread.php?s=218fa33d2963385788fccdb8533d0e0b&p=634308#post634308)
http://forums.sohh.com/showthread.php?t=784361&page=9 (http://forums.sohh.com/showthread.php?t=784361&page=9)
http://www.somethingawful.com/spam/ (http://www.somethingawful.com/spam/)
http://www.pbnation.com/showthread.php?t=1872475 (http://www.pbnation.com/showthread.php?t=1872475)
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Was that before or after you were banned?
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Status: Connected to guide: LisaR
LisaR: Welcome to ChaCha!
LisaR: Hi there
You: Hi Lisa
LisaR: What is it you are searching for?
You: the organization phone losers of America
You: not their main site
You: but sites that have other info about it
LisaR: Well let me see if I can find that
You: I have one more search for you
LisaR: What is that?
You: How can I kill a zombie with my bare hands?
You: ;-)
LisaR: Funny, guess you were my last search
You: Nope
You: I was the one who searched the first time
You: I just save all my conversations, because I am a stalker
LisaR: Well I already know the answer that you can't do it, so any other searches today :)
You: Is Lisa your real first name, or a pseudonym?
LisaR: Ah probably
LisaR: It is my real name
You: Is there a hearing impaired version of ChaCha?
You: er...
You: vision impaired
LisaR: Well uuummm no hearing impaired
You: whichever would allow me to make hilarious prank calls
You: And I'm talking HILARIOUS
LisaR: But I suppose if you change your settings for your system it could make it easier for people with vision problems to see
You: No, I mean, people that I could talk to on the phone about retrieving stuff for me
LisaR: Ha, no they don't have that
You: You should read this:
You: http://www.phonelosers.org/forums/index.php?action=who
LisaR: Uhoh another forum?
You: not just any forum
You: I think you're mentioned in it
LisaR: I will check it out
You: wiat
You: one sec
You: http://www.phonelosers.org/forums/index.php?topic=882.0
You: that's the exact address.
You: Give me one sec.
You: I promise I'll give you a high rating
You: There. Read the second page of the second link I sent you
You: You should register for the PLA forums
You: you'd like it
You: And you can post your funny ChaCha logs
You: I'm going to find another guide to harass, though
You: Seeya
You: You should end this so I can rate you
You: HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY
You: HEY
You: HEY
You: HEY
You: CACTUS
You: CACTUS
You: BUTTFUCKER CHICKEN MONGER
You: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER
LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER)
You: Got your attention?
You: CHICKENFUCKER ASSMONGING MONGLOID MONGLE
You: ASS ASS ASS ASS ASS
You: ASS ASS
You: ASS
You: ASS
You: ASS
You: VIOLENT RAPE
You: LISA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You: FUCK FUCK FUCK
LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (FUCK FUCK FUCK)
You: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER
LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER)
You: NIGGER
LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER)
You: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck)
You: isaR: What is that? You: How can I kill a zombie with my bare hands? You: ;-) LisaR: Funny, guess you were my last search You: Nope You: I was the one who searched the first time You: I just save all my conversations, because I am a stalker LisaR: Well I already know the answer that you can't do it, so any other searches today :) You: Is Lisa your real first name, or a pseudonym? LisaR: Ah probably LisaR: It is my real name You: Is there a hearing impaired version of ChaCha? You: er... You: vision impaired LisaR: Well uuummm no hearing impaired You: whichever would allow me to make hilarious prank calls You: And I'm talking HILARIOUS LisaR: But I suppose if you change your settings for your system it could make it easier for people with vision problems to see You: No, I mean, people that I could talk to on the phone about retrieving stuff for me LisaR: Ha, no they don't have that You: You should read this: You: http://www.phonelosers.org/forums/index.php?action=who LisaR: Uhoh another forum? You: not just any forum You: I think you're mentioned in it LisaR: I will check it out You: wiat You: one sec You: http://www.phonelosers.org/forums/index.php?topic=882.0 You: that's the exact address. You: Give me one sec. You: I promise I'll give you a high rating You: There. Read the second page of the second link I sent you You: You should register for the PLA forums You: you'd like it You: And you can post your funny ChaCha logs You: I'm going to find another guide to harass, though You: Seeya You: You should end this so I can rate you You: HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY You: HEY You: HEY You: HEY You: CACTUS You: CACTUS You: BUTTFUCKER CHICKEN MONGER You: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER) You: Got your attention? You: CHICKENFUCKER ASSMONGING MONGLOID MONGLE You: ASS ASS ASS ASS ASS You: ASS ASS You: ASS You: ASS You: ASS You: VIOLENT RAPE You: LISA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You: FUCK FUCK FUCK LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (FUCK FUCK FUCK) You: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER) You: NIGGER LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER) You: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck)
LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (isaR: What is that? You: How can I kill a zombie with my bare hands? You: ;-) LisaR: Funny, guess you were my last search You: Nope You: I was the one who searched the first time You: I just save all my conversations, because I am a stalker LisaR: Well I already know the answer that you can't do it, so any other searches today :) You: Is Lisa your real first name, or a pseudonym? LisaR: Ah probably LisaR: It is my real name You: Is there a hearing impaired version of ChaCha? You: er... You: vision impaired LisaR: Well uuummm no hearing impaired You: whichever would allow me to make hilarious prank calls You: And I'm talking HILARIOUS LisaR: But I suppose if you change your settings for your system it could make it easier for people with vision problems to see You: No, I mean, people that I could talk to on the phone about retrieving stuff for me LisaR: Ha, no they don't have that You: You should read this: You: http://www.phonelosers.org/forums/index.php?action=who LisaR: Uhoh another forum? You: not just any forum You: I think you're mentioned in it LisaR: I will check it out You: wiat You: one sec You: http://www.phonelosers.org/forums/index.php?topic=882.0 You: that's the exact address. You: Give me one sec. You: I promise I'll give you a high rating You: There. Read the second page of the second link I sent you You: You should register for the PLA forums You: you'd like it You: And you can post your funny ChaCha logs You: I'm going to find another guide to harass, though You: Seeya You: You should end this so I can rate you You: HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY You: HEY You: HEY You: HEY You: CACTUS You: CACTUS You: BUTTFUCKER CHICKEN MONGER You: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER) You: Got your attention? You: CHICKENFUCKER ASSMONGING MONGLOID MONGLE You: ASS ASS ASS ASS ASS You: ASS ASS You: ASS You: ASS You: ASS You: VIOLENT RAPE You: LISA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You: FUCK FUCK FUCK LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (FUCK FUCK FUCK) You: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER) You: NIGGER LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER) You: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck))
You: Fucking ban me?
LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (Fucking ban me?)
You: DO SOMETHING
You: DO SOMETHING
You: DO SOMETHING
You: DO SOMETHING
You: DO SOMETHING
You: KILL ME
You: KILL ME
You: KILL ME
You: DRUGS AND CHILDREN
You: sex and minors
I'm pretty sure she was busy reading it and not listening to me, or just enjoying everything I was saying.
or reporting all our conversations. I dunno.
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Was that before or after you were banned?
I'm unbanned now. Guess it was just temporary.
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They must be getting hit hard by us tonight... they didn't even give me a chance.
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: JasonR
JasonR: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi Jason
JasonR: What can I find for you?
You: tigger vs batman. I want to know who would win
You: in a fight
Transfer: You are being transfered to another guide who can help you search even better!
Looking for guide ...
Status: Guide not located.
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: AlyssaB
AlyssaB: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi
AlyssaB: Hello there :)
AlyssaB: What can I help you find about Tigger and Batman?
You: I want to know who would win
You: like, in a fight
AlyssaB: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.
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I bet they're all reading the PLA forums seeing their names in print.
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That was fun.
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: DeniseA
DeniseA: Welcome to ChaCha!
DeniseA: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
You: hi
You: i want to know about making my computer better
You: like faster and stuff
DeniseA: What kind of computer do you have now?
DeniseA: Is it Windows or Mac? What version operating system?
You: its kind of old. its windows 98
You: something by compact or something
You: i was wondering where i could download upgrades
DeniseA: Okay, let me see what I can find.
You: i know there are "illegal" sites but are there legal ones where i can download upgrades???
DeniseA: This may help you decide if it's worth upgrading.
You: like, megahertz upgrades
DeniseA: Well, you can things that can help with the function of your system...
DeniseA: But, it is a system that is no longer supported by Microsoft.
You: but it functions good. i just want it to be faster
DeniseA: Have you considered upgrading RAM memory?
You: i dont know what that is
DeniseA: Let me find you some info on that.
You: ok, ram upgrade souns good
You: where can i download that??
You: is there a webesiter?
DeniseA: It's fairly cheap, but it's a piece of hardware you have to buy and have someone put in your computer.
You: so id have to buy a cd to get it?
You: a ram cd
DeniseA: No, it's like a chip -- or a board.
You: i have to replace the whole board, computer board?
DeniseA: Well, how old is your computer?
You: well its windows 98, so probably from 1998 My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself.
You: 8 years??
DeniseA: oogle.com
DeniseA: Sorry --
You: its ok
DeniseA: Honestly, the things you can do to make it faster, like Ram, would cost very little.....but a used computer would too.
DeniseA: If virus, etc. start to popup in Windows 98, Microsoft no longer supports any upgrades to the system.
You: a new computer would be bettter than used , tho, right?
DeniseA: Oh, yes -- and Dell has some reasonably priced ones.
DeniseA: Let me take you to that site.
DeniseA: Or, even, WalMart or local stores like that.
You: walmart has computesr?
DeniseA: Yes, and you can buy them online, too.
You: no, i think instore would be better
You: can you find me some links on how to steal?
DeniseA: You went through 11 minutes and did very good
DeniseA: Do you want to end now or would you like for me to end it now?
You: thanks i haxx like a pro
You: PRO HAXX
You: HAXX
DeniseA: You were good -- had me going for a long time.
You: HAXX
You: HAXX
You: HAXX
You: HAXX
You: HAXX
DeniseA: HOOOOOOO HOOOOOO HOOOOO
You: PRO HAXX YOU'D
You: YOU WAS PRO HAXXDDDD
DeniseA: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.
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Damn it I had a good one but the I got that stupid "abusive action" screen
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I was grinning the whole time waiting to deilver this punchline.
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: JeannieR
JeannieR: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi
JeannieR: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
You: I'm looking for the big dipper in relation to the little dipper
JeannieR: Please clarify your search
JeannieR: Sure just a moment
You: Any luck?
JeannieR: still searching
You: Hmm... these seem to be about stars
JeannieR: The big and little dipper are stars
You: no... I'm looking for utensils
JeannieR: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
Status: Session ended.
-
Here's a good idea I had that I couldn't make work
My goal here was to try to get the chick to feel sorry for me and describe duckjob.wav to me. Feel free to try this for a better response than the cold-hearted Christine...
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: ChristineG
ChristineG: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi, thanks
ChristineG: What exactly are you looking for tonight?
ChristineG: Hi.
You: I'm trying to find some joke my friends keep telling me about
ChristineG: Ok...I can see if I can find it.
You: it's called like, duck jobs or duck job or something
ChristineG: So I think you need to explain this more.
You: Well, I think it's like a sound file or something... but I'm deaf. And I can't get them to explain it to me
You: they just tell me it's funny but I wouldn't understand
You: So I'm hoping to find something that will explain it
ChristineG: Well then I suppose that I can't help either.
ChristineG: I am only here to find web sites for you.
ChristineG: Sorry.
You: Well I was hoping the duck job might be on a website somewhere
ChristineG: It is but there is no explaination for it and I know that you wont be able to hear it...so I dont have any information for you.
ChristineG: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.
The worst part is, if you google "duck job" you get a description in the second hit, proving how google's algorithm is superior even to actual intelligence.
-
Fun times searching for help upgrading an ancient mac to mac os x. (These were practically out before I was born)
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: DorisP
DorisP: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi
DorisP: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
DorisP: hi
DorisP: what is a mac quadra?
You: I need to figure out how to make this computer run faster
You: thats the type of PC I have
DorisP: let me transfer you to another guide that hopefully know more about this subject than I do...
DorisP: I know nothing about making computers go faster,,,
DorisP: my transfer button will not work for some reason
You: oh noes!
DorisP: oh yes..
DorisP: none of them work at the moment...
You: How about the Power Macintosh 6100...
DorisP: I apologize if it causes you an inconvenience
DorisP: I know nothing but let me see if I can find some sites that might help you...
DorisP: I will give it my best
DorisP: how about free mac tec support?
You: They don't support this one anymore for some reason
DorisP: ohhhhhh sorry..
DorisP: info from answers..that might help some
You: I need to figure out how to get OS X Loaded on to either my Quadra or Macintosh LC
DorisP: let me try that transfer button again
DorisP: I suggest you try a new search...
DorisP: sorry I could not help you...I am useless when it comes to this subject..
You: ok
DorisP: sorry..
Status: Session ended.
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: MariaP
MariaP: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hello
MariaP: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
You: I have a computer question
MariaP: What exactly is your question?
You: I need to figure out how to get OS X Loaded on to either my Quadra or my Power Macintosh 9500
MariaP: searching...
You: how do I do that?
MariaP: searching...
MariaP: Located info. yet unable to send results, please be patient as I transfer you to another guide..
Transfer: You are being transfered to another guide who can help you search even better!
Looking for guide ...
Status: Guide not located.
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: AMYB
AMYB: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi
You: I need help with my computer
AMYB: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
You: making it go faster
AMYB: ok
You: its a power macintosh 9600
AMYB: ok just a moment
AMYB: you can order upgrades off that page
You: is there any software?
You: I need to figure out how to get OS X Loaded on to it
You: any ideas?
AMYB: well that last site i sent you has ways to make you pc run faster
You: you didn't send me any sites
AMYB: why wont it let you load it?
You: maby its hacked by the PLA or something
AMYB: hmm they must not be going through hold on
You: other guides had alot of trouble too
AMYB: do you see the results now?
You: nope. I only see the word" cactus" blinking under Guide Results
You: is that supposed to happen?
AMYB: no
Transfer: You are being transfered to another guide who can help you search even better!
Looking for guide ...
Status: Guide not located.
-
JeannieR: The big and little dipper are stars
:D the big and little dipper are constellations not stars My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself.
how does this site make enough money to pay thousands of guides ?
-
Ads.
-
Search on "pranks on chacha guides"
...
Here's the links she gave me:
http://forum.abestweb.com/showthread.php?s=218fa33d2963385788fccdb8533d0e0b&p=634308#post634308 (http://forum.abestweb.com/showthread.php?s=218fa33d2963385788fccdb8533d0e0b&p=634308#post634308)
http://forums.sohh.com/showthread.php?t=784361&page=9 (http://forums.sohh.com/showthread.php?t=784361&page=9)
http://www.somethingawful.com/spam/ (http://www.somethingawful.com/spam/)
http://www.pbnation.com/showthread.php?t=1872475 (http://www.pbnation.com/showthread.php?t=1872475)
That's awesome. I can't believe she gave you a link to something awful forums!
_________________________________________________________
OK here's another one
Search terms: abortion clinic doctors
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: sherryh
sherryh: Welcome to ChaCha!
sherryh: Hello what state
You: Thank you, may the Lord bless you and your family on this holiday season
sherryh: Thank you
You: I am looking for a doctor
You: a doctor who manages or runs an abortion clinic
You: like a director?
<long pause>
You: Hello, are you still there?
sherryh: Yes
You: Oh praise Jesus
You: I was praying that somethign bad hadn't happened to you
You: ok I need to find the names of doctors who manage, direct or own abotrionj clinics
sherryh: no he hit me with a bolt of lighting, but im ok
You: Have you accepted Jesus as your own pewrsonal Lord and Savior?
You: I am asking because as another child of God I am concerned for your immortal soul
sherryh: yes, he know me very well...
You: Praise Jesus
You: I am so happy to hear that we are on the same page
You: I feel I can talk to you freely
You: OK well the information I need is
You: I heard there is a website
You: a list of abortion clinic owners and directors
You: can you help me find it?
You: it's a good Christian website
sherryh: why are you going to blow it up
You: please don't suggest such things
You: that's terrible!
sherryh: i was just wondering
You: well don't you know that the FBI monitor internet communications?
sherryh: most christians blow them up
sherryh: i think they heard
You: can you help me finjd this website?
sherryh: ok
You: I believe the webmasters name is a reverend joseph krupp or something like that
<sends links to news reports about abortion clinic bombings>
You: hmmm... no that's not it
You: this is more of a homepage
sherryh: Heres enjoyable reading
<sends link to FBI.gov>
You: This Reverend Krupp is a righteous Christian soldier
sherryh: is he for real?
<sends links to stories about a confessed abortion clinic murderer>
You: The FBI, the freemasons and the Jews are an evil cabal of Satan worshippers
You: it's true but you won't find that on their website
sherryh: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
Status: Session ended.
-
Ads.
can they really turn a profit and pay so many guides with just ads ? it doesnt seem like theres really any excess of them.
-
As one guide put it:
You: how's the pay?
DoreenM: very different from the usual types
DoreenM: below minimum wage..
-
I'm trying to get the guide to look up this story (http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2191192).
Search terms: bangbros kacey thanksgiving dinner
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: ShawnaB
ShawnaB: Welcome to ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.
<My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself.! ShawnaB took one look at the search terms and bailed on me!>
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: MargaretM
MargaretM: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi
MargaretM: hello
You: I am looking for a story on the internet
MargaretM: what can i help you find tonight
MargaretM: okay
MargaretM: what story?
You: it's about a guy who met his long lost sister at thanksgiving dinner
You: her name is kacey
MargaretM: do you know the title or the author?
You: no, but it was reported in a message board forum
MargaretM: it is a short story?
You: his dad told him before thanksgiving dinner that his sister would be there, and he had never met her before
You: they had been separated when he was a baby
You: it's a true story
MargaretM: okay
MargaretM: i think i can find this
MargaretM: i see some info in my initial search
MargaretM: I appreciate your patience while I find exactly what you need.
You: my friend told me about it, but I don't know what internet page it is on
<a few minutes pass...>
MargaretM: is the story written by tony early by any chance?
You: I don't think so.
You: this is not a story by a professional author
You: at least I dont think it is
MargaretM: okay
You: not the way it was described to me
MargaretM: let me see what i can find
You: have you found anything?
MargaretM: Thanks for being patient! Rest assured I'm finding the most relevant results for your search.
<several more minutes pass>
You: Margaret? Are you reading the story?
MargaretM: no - i am looking for it
You: Well, I think it's pretty recent
You: so how is this job?
You: you have to be good at computers?
MargaretM: yes
MargaretM: i like it
MargaretM: this is a tough one though :)
You: how's the pay?
MargaretM: i love a good search
MargaretM: not great
You: yeah me too
MargaretM: it is extra pocket money for me
You: they say it's not the catch, but the thrill of the chase that is the best part
<more time passes... I think she's hip to the fact that this is a raunchy story, and she's not even bothering to really look, but just wasting time to fill her 10 minutes...>
You: so is this Chacha a good search engine or what?
MargaretM: i am sorry
MargaretM: i am not finding it
You: eh?
MargaretM: would you like me to transfer you to another guide?
You: maybe try Google or something
You: ok sure
MargaretM: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
BTW, a search on Google brought up the page IMMEDIATELY, the first 3 results are all it!
(http://img89.imageshack.us/img89/1069/googlesearcheu9.gif)
____________________________________________
OK Here's another try at getting them to link the same story. I got banned once for trying this, but apparently the bans only last a half-hour or so.
Search terms: Kacey Thanksgiving Dinner sister
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: MaryR
MaryR: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi Mary
MaryR: Good evening.
You: am looking for a story
MaryR: All right.
You: my co-worker told me about it
You: it's about a guy who goes to thanksgiving dinner and finds out he has a long-lost half-sister
MaryR: Yes?
You: it's on a
You: message board?
You: what is a message board?
MaryR: It's where members write messages to each other.
You: oh ok
MaryR: Why don't you ask your co-worker what message board it is and go to it to read the story?
You: I'm not at work any more
MaryR: I wouldn't have any idea what message board it is.
You: I'm at home
You: well can you find the story?
MaryR: I don't know. I can look. Please wait.
You: ok
You: is this a good job?
MaryR: I like it.
You: i bet you have to be good with compuers
You: I'm terrible with computers
MaryR: I've been using computers for years.
You: I don't know a gagabit from a fractional t
You: it's all gobbledygook to m,e
MaryR: Then you're out of luck.
You: why do they have to be so complicated
You: my friend is good with them and he helps me out
You: where is this cha cha located?
You: are you in Kentucky?
MaryR: All the guides work out of their homes.
You: that sounds nice
You: have you ever been to Lexington?
MaryR: No, I haven't
You: You should come visit some time
You: It's wonderful. The people are so nice and the shoppiing is to die for
You: where are you from?
MaryR: I found the story, but it is restricted.
You: restricted how?
MaryR: To adults.
You: well I'm 57 years old, I think I'm adult enough
MaryR: But I have no way of actually knowing you are that old.
You: ok well ask me something that only somebody my age would know
You: my husband fought in the battle of Hue in Vietnam. He just turned 60 this august
You: I used to work for Sears Roebuck until they closed down the store here in Lexington KY
MaryR: That's interesting.
MaryR: I can't give you the results because we have rules against linking to pornographic content
You: Pornographic?
MaryR: Yes.
You: Oh, that Marco!
You: He's such a kidder! That's just like him to send me off looking for something like that
You: I keep telling him that he can get in trouble
You: Our employer has rules against that kind of thing
MaryR: Most employers do.
You: Yes, but I don't want to get him fired because that would end our hot office romance!
MaryR: Is there anything else I can help you find this evening?
You: That Marco sure has a big one. He always fills me up just right!
MaryR: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.
-
Ha, ChaCha actually responded to my request to be a guide. After a bit of my own searching, the max a guide could truly make would be less then $2.50 and hour, if that....
-
Hey, thats probably prime wage in India.
-
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: KarenJ
You: hi KJ
KarenJ: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: yeah thanks
You: wassup?
KarenJ: not much
You: I can imagine
You: hey listen, I wanna learn cha cha cha
You: can u help?
Transfer: You are being transfered to another guide who can help you search even better!
Looking for guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: christinaz
christinaz: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: lo lady
christinaz: Hello
You: the other one didn't help me too much, hope you will
christinaz: Ok
You: I wanna learn cha cha cha, can u help?
christinaz: sure,the dance? correct?
You: yeah
christinaz: Ok,let me see what i can find for you
You: Mambo as well...
You: Karen J was really rude, will you report her attitude?
christinaz: sorry,theres no way i could
You: pitty
christinaz: you can,they will check the log and decide
You: who is "they"
christinaz: Thats a good a question
You: can u serach that for me?
christinaz: Some one at chacha i quess
christinaz: sure can
You: thank u
christinaz: your very welcome
You: are you searching?
christinaz: yes i am
You: why the "Z" in your name?
You: right now, you should answer me 4 things
christinaz: first initial of my last name
You: 3 now
You: cha cha cha; mambo and who are they
You: I will give you an extra score for answering "who am I"
christinaz: ok
christinaz: Theres where you contact
You: where is there?
You: sorry for being annoying
You: I'm not much in computers
christinaz: Thats ok
You: yar probably a PC freak ain't ya?
christinaz: The link i sent you,just send feedback
christinaz: They will check the session,and if anyone was rude to you,they will be terminated
You: yeah I've got them, but none of them says anything about "they"
christinaz: Im searching for that now
You: skip it if there's police involved
You: I don't like police
You: do ya?
You: brb
christinaz: Theres the owner of chahca,dont know who works at the main headheadquarters,sorry.
You: can u gimme his phone number?
You: wanna call him personally
You: will tell ya good things about ya
You: promise
christinaz: I dont have that information,sory
You: can u search it?
christinaz: Ican transfer you if you wish?
You: just 4 me
You: with?
You: him?
christinaz: ok,quickly,im suppose to cut off at ten minutes
You: ok transfer me with Scott
You: please?
christinaz: Icantransfer you,not sure who your gonna get though,have a great day!
Transfer: You are being transfered to another guide who can help you search even better!
Looking for guide ...
Status: Guide not located.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
BTW Scott Jones is the creator of the system...
would be nice to reach him
-
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: KimberlyB
KimberlyB: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: hey KB
KimberlyB: Hi how are you?
You: doing it
KimberlyB: Please be more specific as to what you're looking for on this topic.
You: listen, I'm looking for a good searching tool and somebody told me that you can help me to find it
You: can u?
KimberlyB: Thanks for being patient! Rest assured I'm finding the most relevant results for your search.
KimberlyB: Yes one moment please
KimberlyB: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.
-
I really think now that some agents are bots:
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: NoellaP
NoellaP: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Noella hi sweety
NoellaP: Hi! How may I help you?
You: I've got a GF with that name once
You: hope isn't you
You: N? is that you?
NoellaP: Can I find anything for you today?
You: anywas
You: yar right
You: yes
You: I'm looking for a burglar that stole my place here and I was looking for some tracking system for Burglars
You: Google says that there's not
You: hope you are better than Google
NoellaP: I cant find a burglar tracking system but if you want I can find you an alarm system!
You: mmm, will that catch any Burglar?
NoellaP: I dont know.
You: you should be a searching guru
NoellaP: Or I can transfer you to another guide.
You: noah
You: I like ya
You: NoellaP
NoellaP: You would like me to search Guru for you?
You: ?
You: ok
You: go 4 it
You: I can't see any results...
NoellaP: Thanks for being patient! Rest assured I'm finding the most relevant results for your search.
NoellaP: Sorry but I cannot find anything on your search, I will trnasfer you if you'd like!
You: but
You: you told me that you've found the Alarm
You: and Guru
NoellaP: Im trnasfering you now!
You: search for that "Guru Alarm"
You: no!!
You: you are kind
NoellaP: Yes, but I cannot waste my time.
You: just search for alarm systems
You: me neither
You: I'm a 24/7 hax0r
You: I'm really busy here
NoellaP: Your going to have to leave and search again. Your first search didnt give me any hits and I have a blank page.
NoellaP: Have a Good Day! Happy Holidays!
NoellaP: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.
-
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: SylvyS
SylvyS: Welcome to ChaCha!
Transfer: You are being transfered to another guide who can help you search even better!
Looking for guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: AlishaG
AlishaG: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: what is brad carters phone number?
You: he is a phoneloser too from oregon
AlishaG: phoneloser?
You: yes
You: of phonelosers.org
AlishaG: i'm not familiar with that site.
You: you should check out the forums there!
You: that is where i found out about chacha guides
AlishaG: oh cool.
AlishaG: well i'm sorry but my search is not finding a brad carter in oregon
AlishaG: is there anything else i can do for you?
You: oh bummer. sure, why not go register on the forums and make a post on the Chacha thread?
AlishaG: oh wait, i think i found some :)
You: oh, cool!!
You: wow, thanks!! see you on the forums!!
AlishaG: sure thing!
AlishaG: have a great night
AlishaG: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
Status: Session ended.
-
Status: Looking for a guide ...
This was a interesting search....
Status: Connected to guide: RichardM
RichardM: Welcome to ChaCha!
RichardM: Hello, how are you?
You: Good, happy holidays
RichardM: You too.
RichardM: What can I help you find?
You: I need to find a device that homes in on GPS signals
You: you see,
You: My wife took off with my 3 kids in my lexus, and left a note saying she would never return
You: the car has a GPS built in, and I need to track her down.
RichardM: Do you have on-star or something?
You: Its similar,
You: Shoud I report the car stolen?
You: They can't be out of the state by now...
RichardM: Well most people in this situation call the police
You: Ok
You: No GPS FInders?
You: I NEED TO TRACK HER DOWN!
RichardM: Well gps is different then a homing beacon
You: but in the movies it allways works!
You: have you seen mission impossible 3?
RichardM: It communicates with satelites and not by broadcasting a signal
RichardM: No, movies are lame.
You: Have you read Mission impossible 3?
RichardM: Every movie is a spin off of another movie
RichardM: No
You: Just because its a sequal doesnt mean its a spin off
You: well if you saw it then you would know that it IS POSSIBLE
RichardM: Do you know anything about how a gps system works?
You: Duh
You: you look at a screen and it shows you where the people are
You: Oh wait
RichardM: It sends a signal to between 4 and 6 satelites then uses their position to find where you are
You: Oh so now you're the geinus
You: So can you tell me where I an get some cloroform?
RichardM: No, I cannot.
You: how do I get her to cooperate when I track her down?
RichardM: You call the police and they will take care of it
RichardM: If she strugles they will mace her or take her down
RichardM: The usual
You: What do you mean "take her down"
You: Will they "take the kids down" too?
RichardM: No
RichardM: Just the person considered to be a suspect.
You: I need them back home.
You: In the cages
RichardM: Ohh cages?
RichardM: What kind do you use?
You: How do you think they escaped!
You: Jimmy chewed the lock off his
RichardM: Inferior cage construction?
You: Pretty much
You: next time, im getting iorn bars
RichardM: That's a problem with most cages.
You: No wooden planks for me anymore
RichardM: Use steel it doesn't rust as quickly and less expensive
RichardM: Also it's lighter so easier on your back.
You: can you give me a link to a masterlock they can't bite through?
RichardM: That first one with the titanium reinforced pad
RichardM: Or the hasp, those work good too
You: What do you reccoment for the feeding trays?
RichardM: On the door put a sliding mechanism so you can slide the tray through
You: and how she learned to drive a manual is beyond me...
RichardM: Then slide back and lock
You: Do you think the basment air will get to them after a while?
RichardM: Nah they are kids, children are resiliant
You: Its high in asbestos...
RichardM: Asbestos builds character
You: I think there was some radon gas down there too
RichardM: So does character
RichardM: I mean cancer
You: Good.
RichardM: Radon is a myth made up to scare children like the boogey man or michael jackson
You: Well when I get them passed out in the back of the UHALL and back home by tomorow, they won't know what hit 'em (no pun intended)
RichardM: Your best bet is to use tranquilizer darts
You: Where can I get those?
RichardM: Long range and effective
RichardM: Lots of sporting supply and army surplus stores can help you
You: Cool.
RichardM: Try a blow dart
You: Do you have a m ustash?
RichardM: No
RichardM: But I do have antlers
You: HOLY SHIT
RichardM: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (HOLY SHIT)
You: What was that?
You: info seaker?!
RichardM: yeah that's you
You: was that the goverment?
RichardM: No
RichardM: it was the iluminati
RichardM: they watch everything but they don't really care
You: Oh
You: Well
You: Good "Searching"
RichardM: Anything else I can help you find?
You: Im posting this on my website btw...
You: its
You: www.phonelosers.org
RichardM: I've actually got quite a reputation on the wow sites
You: World of Warcraft?
RichardM: the forums there
RichardM: yeah
You: Well now you have a rep in
You: the phone phreaking/hacking scene
You: congrads
RichardM: eh
RichardM: I usually mess with people too
You: You can see all the other guides we messed with on there
RichardM: so no big deal
You: k
You: bye
-
I kinda laugh when the guide asks you if you understand how GPS works when he doesn't even understand the system itself....
Little hint for ya Richard, GPS operates as a simplex method of communication, now you get to guess which way!
-
This is weird, I tried getting a guide to go to this link, and I got this weird screen that said chatting was disabled because I attempted a possibly abusive action or something. What bullshit!!
-
Got bored again and decided to have them search for something I couldn't find myself.
Status: Connecting ...
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: DavidB
DavidB: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi David.
You: I'm looking for a picture, I need a silohette of a guy holding a mic
You: It's gotta have a hip hop feel to it know what I'm sayin'
You: wtf dude? It's not like I don't already have abandonment issues (Eight and a half minutes later)
You: Thanks, I'm done.
Status: Session ended.
Status: No connection.
Status: Connecting ...
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: aaronk
aaronk: Welcome to ChaCha!
aaronk: Hello
aaronk: How may I help you?
You: I hope you're better than the last guy.
aaronk: oh man
You: He just left me hangin' for like 8 minutes
aaronk: My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself.
aaronk: they will do that
aaronk: I hope I can help then
You: I know, I was like dude, at least tell me you can't find it
You: I need a silohette of guy holding microphone
You: specifically a picture that is a silohette of a guy holding microphone
aaronk: One moment
You: You'd think there's be gifs all over the web
aaronk: I know like the Itunes pictures
You: Yeah
You: But holdin' a microphone
aaronk: damn got a girl
You: Way smarter than that jerk EdyeD or whatever. Nope
You: No girl
aaronk: okay
You: if you can't find that try just a silohuette of a mic
You: top one is k inda, that dude is so black if you set him in the yard people would think he was one of those wooden silohettes (url she sent me http://www.thisfabtrek.com/journey/africa/mali/20060205-segou/adama-yalomba3-det-4.jpg (http://www.thisfabtrek.com/journey/africa/mali/20060205-segou/adama-yalomba3-det-4.jpg)
You: gettin warmer
aaronk: got it!
aaronk: its just wont load
You: hmm. well that's no good. maybe you could find like an icon or something for me sweetness
You: Or maybe you'll let me double click yours
You: .My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself.. Just playin'
aaronk: www.totallyphotos.com/photographs.php?id=599
You: Hmm, it refused my connection
aaronk: that sux
aaronk: click the last link you will see what i am talking about
You: yep
You: That's perfect too
aaronk: do you have Ms office picture editor?
You: Hmm, maybe I can get the thumbnail and resize it
You: You read my mind
aaronk: there we go
aaronk: :)
You: I got Paint Shop Pro though.
aaronk: That works
aaronk: Happy with your results?
You: Yes I am, I am completely satisfied
aaronk: Awesome
aaronk: You have a great day
You: You too
aaronk: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
Status: Session ended.
PH33r my total lameness and lack of "game"
-
Ha, ChaCha actually responded to my request to be a guide. After a bit of my own searching, the max a guide could truly make would be less then $2.50 and hour, if that....
That isnt true. There is a timer on the chat screen. A guide only gets paid for the first 10 minutes of a search. I know that some guides make more than I do, but I get 83 cents per 10 minutes. .83 x 6 = $4.98 hr. Although that doesnt seem like much, its worth it to do once in a while. I have made $40 bucks so far just doing it once in a while at night while I watch TV, surf the internet, and chat. Its like im getting paid to just hang out at home and be online. Doing the searches isnt hard. I often get a prankster that just dont say anything. I will just let the timer run to 10 minutes and collect.
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Aparrently you need a "Cha Cha Master" to sponsor you to become a guide, what am i going to do now?
-
Here's an interesting conversation I had.
Status: Connected to guide: MichaelC
MichaelC: Welcome to ChaCha!
MichaelC: hello
You: Hola
You: I need new tanks and artilery (preferably rocket) for my junta
You: soviet surplus would be best
MichaelC: ok
You: You see Castro is close to death so us nationalists are forming a junta in the sierra maestra mountains
MichaelC: oh ok
You: the second he dies, we want to go all out
MichaelC: what is the plan on that?
You: Well we figure we'll have help from the us and resistance should be minimal
MichaelC: you want to take over Cuba?
You: there isnt much patriotism here anymore
You: yes
MichaelC: what exactly for?
MichaelC: I mean I don't like Castro either
You: the US is making it one of those B.Y.O.A. wars
You: bring your own armor
MichaelC: As a US citizen I would like to visit Cuba
MichaelC: does Bush know about this
You: Beautiful country!
You: barbra?
You: or Georgie
MichaelC: yeah
You: Yes
MichaelC: what about the war we already have in Iraq
You: He doesn't care that much
MichaelC: Americans already are dying for a lost cause
You: What is the death toll? We have been in the mountains for so long we don't have much time to look up news.
You: We have to be very clandestine with our movements
MichaelC: I'm not quit sure ....its in the 10 thousands
MichaelC: I have friends over there
You: Wow. i doubt it will be quite that bad here
MichaelC: no, how is cuba's army?
You: We plan to have few ummm "state trials" for criminals
MichaelC: I mean do they all agree with Castro?
You: Cuba's army is pretty weak
You: they don't having undying loyalty to him
You: and in a fight with the us most will give up
MichaelC: true
You: they only have ancient weapons too
MichaelC: Where are you from again?
You: South America
MichaelC: oh really?
You: Bolivia to be exact
MichaelC: what country?
You: yes
MichaelC: oh ok
You: That's why the us trust us.
You: We are from a republic
MichaelC: that makes sense
MichaelC: This is all I could find
You: of course some of us are from america or SA
MichaelC: good luck with your mini war
You: thanks
MichaelC: go get them!
MichaelC: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
Status: Session ended.
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Success!
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I am a Cha-Cha guide. :-\
-
I'm hoping to become one. What does it pay and how do you apply?
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http://www.chacha.com/info/guidesignup
when I signed up, I didn't need an invite or anything, but now im stuck with a ugly w-9 fourm that I cant get past.
everything else is at that site
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Subject Exlax in brownies
Status: Connecting ...
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: CarlH
Status: Connected to guide: CarlH
CarlH: Welcome to ChaCha!
CarlH: Hello, how are you?
You: i need info about adding exlax to brownies
You: for the next family get together
CarlH: Ok, please hold.
You: I'm going to hide the toilet paper
You: and lock the bathrooms
CarlH: My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself.
You: how much exlax do I add to the recipe
CarlH: h/o
CarlH: Check that page out
You: i'm drinking beer right now
You: cool
CarlH: Just mix some powder into the batter and try it on one of your friends first
CarlH: Wonderful
You: i will try it when the next door to door salesman comes around
You: thank you for the info
CarlH: Sounds like a plan
CarlH: Yep
CarlH: Have a good one
You: PLA rules bye bye for now.
CarlH: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
Status: Session ended.
MIB
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I asked a guide for an invite. You have to do a certian number of searches before you can get paid. From apprentice to guide, from guide to master and from master to elite. I am a guide and get paid very little at the moment, but it is fun and the people are really nice! You get paid more as you move up in rank.
-
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: CadyD
You: hi
CadyD: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: I'm looking for an awsome cha cha guide
CadyD: Hi! How can I help you tonight?
CadyD: I am awesome My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself..
You: how can I be sure?
You: Whats better, Pirates or ninjas?
CadyD: I don't know...how have you been looking for one?
You: I ask people if they are awsome
You: And they usually say yes
CadyD: Pirates, they get the gold
You: NOOOO
You: CHUCK NORRIS
You: YOU FAIL!
You: sorry
You: can you redirect me now?
CadyD: Right, sorry
CadyD: Why?
You: I'm looking for an awsome cha cha guide
CadyD: You will get reported eventually
CadyD: For abusing the system
You: I'm not abusing it
You: I'm scanning it
CadyD: ChaCha is a search engine, not a chat room
You: I'm the awsomeness scanner
CadyD: I'm sure you are
You: I was hired by cha hca
CadyD: Right
You: Its true
CadyD: How were you hired?
You: I went to the main page
You: clicked on the work tab
CadyD: YOU FAIL!
You: and signed up to work
You: NOPE
CadyD: there is no such thing
You: yes
CadyD: No, there isn't
You: If you were awsome you would know
-Reported: Disconnect-
Anyways, you dont want a job there... its only $5 an hour, and a talking hour. meaning you have to be connected, not idling. and after 10 minutes connected to one user, the timer stops. FTL!
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Yeah, it isn't a good deal at first, but if you work your way up, it is OK. Supposedly the Elites actually make a living.
Either way, it is totally bargian basement at the moment, the Java application is pretty clunky.
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Yeah, it's actually pretty lame.
But then again, so am I.
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Elites are paid poorly, too; $10 for each hour of search time spent searching so called elite keywords. But they also get 10% of any sponsored guide's profits. Still if your sitting on the couch surfin' it wouldn't be bad to make ten bucks while you surf.
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It takes a lot of BS to move up too. Lots of freaks though, which keeps it entertaining.
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damn you and you're valid social security numbers!
-
Yeah mine's not working either
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Aww cmon guys its not that hard I became a guide with false info you can to!
Guide: Welcome to ChaCha!
Guide: Hello!
Guide: What do you need help searching for?
Info Seeker: man
Info Seeker: I need to talk to CristiV
Info Seeker: you know her?
Guide: May I ask why?
Info Seeker: she sounded hot
Guide: I can be just as hot too.
Info Seeker: man no I ain't into no dudes, just patch me into CristiV
Guide: Theirs nothing wrong with homosexuality.
Info Seeker: no there isn't, so long as the dudes in question are into other dudes. I aint, so get me her
Guide: Welcome to ChaCha!
Info Seeker: do you think you can find me pictures or videos of preteen models?
Guide: Hello!
Info Seeker: hi
Guide: Sure no problem.
Guide: Male or female models?
Info Seeker: female
Guide: Are these results sufficient?
Info Seeker: not really
Guide: Whats wrong with it?
Info Seeker: it has nothing to do with preteen models..
Guide: But its the PLA!
Guide: Cactus?
Info Seeker: yes
Info Seeker: what other games you play ?
Guide: cactus cactus cactus?
Info Seeker: i asked u a question tard ?
Guide: cactus.
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Can you sponsor me Fred? I've decided that I'm in no position to turn down such easy money.
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I don't have any invites left, although I can probably find someone who does.
PM me your email address.
BTW, you have to be 18+ to participate, FYI ;)
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I can send you an invite. :-\I need your word you wont get me in trouble. PL. Send me a pm if you want an invite.
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its ok he was born in 1958
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And yet I still go to middle school. :-\
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OK. I sent you an invite to become a guide. If any other PLAs want in well then send me a pm. It's a true social engineering frontier.
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But it sucks if they don't accept your SS# to get paid...
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True, true.
*gave actual info*
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*not really* ;)
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How'd you fake the SS# isn't that pretty unique stuff?
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I CLEARLY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT, EVER. how much clearer I can be.
1) Get someones name and address from a phone book or something.
2) Enter all the info into the proper forms.
3) When it came time to enter shit in for the SSN I checked the partnership box and made up a company name (something like roy gerbil &co.)
4) When I filled out the EIN I just typed random ass numbers in but it has to be nine numbers long.
I mean c'mon its not that hard do you guys need screen shots or something?
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I'd really rather get paid directly for this, and the last thing I need is some shit from the IRS.
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California law prohibits lack of service for not supplying a SSN (except for cell phone services)... so i wouldn't have to give them one right?
or is that only for consumers?
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or is that only for consumers?
service =/= employment
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This whole company is going to be outsourced before you can say "Balaji"
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If they make it that long, it is pretty low budget.
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i dont know anything about chacha history. if i did, i would try to forget it. who knows what this company will do in the next week let alone 6 months. i got an email today saying they were coming out with a completely new guide client. so, i guess that means they are still kickin. send me pms for invites with your email addresses please...
that includes you.
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I got this back on the 10th..
Hi ******,
You were reported as having posted a picture of ChaCha’s application on a forum. That content is property of ChaCha Search, inc. and we would prefer you did not post such material as it is in violation of ChaCha’s public discussion policy.
Consider this a warning as it was relatively innocuous and upon investigation you seem to be a very effective. Let’s just not let it happen again.
Thanks
Justin Keller
Soo when the new application comes out... dont post sceenshots of it. Or if you do be more discreet about it.
I really have no idea how they knew I posted a screen shot when I did. I created a totally new email for chacha and my sn I always use isnt even contected to it. Its like they can see into my soul... CHACHA SCARES ME!
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I really have no idea how they knew I posted a screen shot when I did.
Be afraid! Be very afraid!
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hmm. interesting. i seem to have in my personal possession quite a few chacha screenshots from either searches gone bad, or just messing with people that are trying to mess with a guide. (which is miraculously easier than it may sound) i cant count the number of times some punk searches for something stupid and just starts talking to me. i usually will get the better end of the deal asking the user to search for something so i can get paid. after all, thats the only motivation guides have to do the job. (well, other than the satisfaction of helping grandma and retarded college student a looking for you to do all the research they have for a 10 page essay. chachacha
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Yesterday I didn't get a chance to post this piece of news that greeted me as I logged in:
ChaCha News
News Update: Monday, January 29, 2007
Guide Deactivation: Acting inappropriately during Training sessions
We continue to hear reports of Guides acting inappropriately in Training, both trainers and trainees. Abusing training sessions is detrimental to our Guide community and to ChaCha.
ChaCha will immediately deactivate any Guide that acts inappropriately during training sessions, including ‘milking the session’ and berating other Guides. Trainers should treat each training session as if they were a person searching on ChaCha.com. You can provide additional constructive feedback on the profile page using graffiti messaging.
Each Guide must read through the following posts PRIOR to your next training session and report any training abuse to ChaCha via the feedback form in the KnowledgeBase, including the search query, date and time of each training session.
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Hey everyone I'm new to the forums but not to the site. This is my first post here so don't flame me or anything because my Cha Cha was kinda boring and dumb BUt I want to post it anyway.
Status: Connecting ...
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: Sherrie(72217)
Sherrie(72217): Welcome to ChaCha!
You: HI
Sherrie(72217): hello
Sherrie(72217): what is it you're looking for??
You: Can you search for the CHa Cha search in the pla forems
Sherrie(72217): Umm sure i guess
You: Have you found it?
Sherrie(72217): umm
Sherrie(72217): it says i need to sign up
You: It doesn't tell me that.
Sherrie(72217): Well maybe you are signed up :)
Sherrie(72217): actually i found it
You: Well you need to go sign up to look at it. You'll LIke it!
You: You need to read it.
Sherrie(72217): alright how much of it?
Sherrie(72217): interesting
You: Just as much as you want, no wait just page 2.
Sherrie(72217): So i guess I'm going to be on your forums ?
Sherrie(72217): Wow, I found a sherri c on here
You: No your not exiting BUT, if you say something crazy You'll go down in history and become famos!
Sherrie(72217): Really?
You: Probably.
You: *cough*
Sherrie(72217): Hm let me think of something
Sherrie(72217): I got it
Sherrie(72217): ok ok
Sherrie(72217): It's a joke
You: ok
You: go on
Sherrie(72217): Ok so
< 8 minute wait >
You: so......
You: AHH I JUST CUT MYSELF ON MY SWORD!!!
You: I REALLY HURTS
You: MY HAND IS BLEEDING!!!!!!!!
You: I"M NOT JOKING!!!
You: I CAUGHT IT THE WRONG WAY AND THEN OUCH!!!!!!!
You: DAMN KATANAS!!!!!!
You: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You: but serously tell me the joke
You: i got blood on my shirt now
You: you atleast owe me a joke
You: even if it is bleek unorganized and boring
You: Hello?
You: You bitch!
You: Fuck!!!!!!
I really did cut my hand by the way but it wasn't bad.
-
I told them to look up a picture of "A sad mime riding a unicycle" After a hour and being redirected i manged to stump her ;D ! Good times
(notice it goes from Sid,To a veitnam vetran to sarah to lisa)
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: Elizabeth(73602)
Elizabeth(73602): Welcome to ChaCha!
You: hey
Elizabeth(73602): Hi there
Elizabeth(73602): What is it that you are searching for?
You: Yeah can you tell me what the phone losers of america is.
Elizabeth(73602): I'll try
You: Thank you hunny
You: oohh
You: thanks
You: buh bye
You: Thanks, I'm done.
Status: Session ended.
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Ring: ...
Status: Connected to guide: Kelly(29029)
Kelly(29029): Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hey!
Kelly(29029): Give me a moment to search for that information.
You: Yeah i need a picture of a sad mime riding a unicycle
You: cool
You: This is for a grandchild in the hospital
You: it would mean alot to little sid
Transfer: You are being transfered to another guide who can help you search even better!
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Ring: ...
Status: Connected to guide: alisha(73533)
alisha(73533): Welcome to ChaCha!
alisha(73533): hello, one moment while i search your query for you
alisha(73533): I"m sorry to say that I am unable to find this for you. Is there anything else I can help you with or would you like me to transfer you?
You: yes
You: please
alisha(73533): transfer?
You: yes
alisha(73533): ok have a great night and good luck
Transfer: You are being transfered to another guide who can help you search even better!
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: Alice(75902)
Alice(75902): Welcome to ChaCha!
You: hey
Alice(75902): Hello! I will be helping you with your search today. In order for me to find the very best websites available for you, it would be best if you would elaborate a little about any specific information you might want.
Alice(75902): Hi there
You: pictures of sad mimes riding unicycles
You: its for a vetran of vietnam
You: whos ill in the hospital
Alice(75902): I'd be happy to help you with that. If you will bear with me one moment, I will compile some information for you.
You: alright
Alice(75902): Tricky one....bear with me one more moment and I'll have something for you
You: nice lady thank you
Alice(75902): You're welcome
Alice(75902): I'm finding sad ones...but none on unicycles. They all look happy riding the unicycles.
Alice(75902): But I'm still looking....I don't give up easily
You: Sure this would mean alot to sarah shes in the hospital because of a fractured wrist and femur
Alice(75902): awwww
Alice(75902): I'm so sorry
Alice(75902): well we'll find something ify ou have time I have time
You: thanks
Alice(75902): They don't look very sad
You: hmm sounds like a ol' photo shop job for rusty devil! Alright thanks allice have a nice day and support www.phonelosers.org
Alice(75902): :-) I'm still looking
You: Thanks!
Alice(75902): See, he isn't sad
Alice(75902): hmmm
You: yeah
Alice(75902): I would have never guessed this would have been as difficult as it has been!
You: Hmm i like the http://www.juggling.org/pics/Pics/clown-uni.jpg photo i think i'm happy with that one lisa will like that thanks!
Alice(75902): You win the award for stumping me, My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself.
Alice(75902): No problem, I hope she feels better
Alice(75902): Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
Status: Session ended.
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This is the best one i've gotten so far :P
This is a search for "Getting away with murder"
Status: Connecting ...
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Ring: ...
Status: Connected to guide: Jason(22017)
Jason(22017): Welcome to ChaCha!
Jason(22017): Welcome to ChaCha! Please wait a moment while I search for your results.
You: kk
Jason(22017): The Papa Roach song or actual ways to get away with it?
You: i hate papa roach, i just want to off this bitch brotha
You: but i want to do it slick like
Jason(22017): hmm..
Jason(22017): Yes disposing of the body will take some creativity
You: yeah i been thinking about that
Jason(22017): What method do you intend to use
You: im open to suggestions, which do you recommend?
Jason(22017): Do you need to hire a hit man or are you going to do this hands-on?
You: i want this clean as possible
You: i dont have the money for a hitman
Jason(22017): What do you have in the way of weapons
You: no guns :/
Jason(22017): Hmm
Jason(22017): How about poisoning
You: poisoning works for me
You: how do i get the right poison though, they would look for rat poison
Jason(22017): Probably
Jason(22017): Can you get your hands on some mehtodone
You: theres a lot of druggies where i live so probably
Jason(22017): I would suggest anything you could make look like a suicide or accidental overdose
-fin-
Another fun search is "Hot to NOT download farm porn" or in that direction.
it seems that alot of chacha guides arent sure about the rules or don't care to follow them, for example one nice lady told me she could not help me find personal information for wilford brimley, but then gave in (after some smooth talk from myself) and helped me after all!
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(http://img249.imageshack.us/img249/4682/randomaj4.th.png) (http://img249.imageshack.us/my.php?image=randomaj4.png)
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"we don't use google"
That is just a load of crap, when i WAS a guide I ONLY used google! My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself.
-
Yeah and I told that bitch pretty damn quick.
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this guide actualy tried to convince me to leave my fictional battered wife:
a search for "Home Correction"
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Ring: ...
Status: Connected to guide: karen(56833)
karen(56833): Welcome to ChaCha!
karen(56833): Hello!
You: hiya
karen(56833): Please be more specific as to what you're looking for on this topic.
You: a definition
You: or a pro\con
karen(56833): Okay,let me see what I can find for you on that topic .
Transfer: You are being transfered to another guide who can help you search even better!
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Ring: ...
Status: Connected to guide: chrysan(15032)
chrysan(15032): Welcome to ChaCha!
chrysan(15032): hello there
chrysan(15032): can i ask for a little more info to your querry?
You: i want to stop beating my wife
You: but i dont know how to make her stay in line
You: without violence
chrysan(15032): ok i will search that for you
chrysan(15032): one moment while i search
You: sure thing
chrysan(15032): this is for a boyfriend but its the same
chrysan(15032): still searching
You: ohh
You: your getting the wrong idea
You: i can stop hitting her anytime i want
You: i just want to make sure she minds
chrysan(15032): ok i will search that
chrysan(15032): see what comes up
chrysan(15032): ok so you want to stop hitting her but you want her to mind?
You: yeah, i need to make sure she listens
You: because the judge says this is my last strike
chrysan(15032): do you think there is anger management involved?
You: what do you mean?
chrysan(15032): i sent a wife submission for you
chrysan(15032): still searching
You: its just
You: i work really long hours
You: at a job i hate
You: i come home i'd like to see what my father saw
chrysan(15032): ok i can understan that
You: dinner on the table
chrysan(15032): yes i agree
chrysan(15032): house clean
You: especially that
chrysan(15032): home made meals
chrysan(15032): dishes clean
chrysan(15032): beds made
chrysan(15032): bathroom clean smells good
chrysan(15032): laundry done
You: that
You: the biggest problem is
chrysan(15032): maybe you and her need to go to counselling
You: that she gets flip
You: late at night, i like to relax and see where things go from there
You: when she says something along the lines of "Not tonight, i have a headache"
chrysan(15032): well this might hurt maybe she does this because she want sout of the marriage
You: i say...heres the advil
chrysan(15032): well obviously she does not want to be intimate with you
chrysan(15032): i think counselling will help you guys
You: thats the thing though
You: she always says no
chrysan(15032): ohh
chrysan(15032): i feel for you
chrysan(15032): you want the right thing
chrysan(15032): you can 't help this if only one person wants better
chrysan(15032): its a 2 way street
chrysan(15032): you want it but she doesn't
chrysan(15032): one hand can't clap
You: i know what your saying
chrysan(15032): does she want a divorce/
chrysan(15032): ?
You: our nights usual end in her calling me a name, then me hitting her
You: thats the thing!!!
You: i want a divorce
You: but im stuck with her
chrysan(15032): well you need to stop hitting
You: she always says "But we can work this out!"
chrysan(15032): and your wife has personal issues she needs to work out
chrysan(15032): she needs help
chrysan(15032): she is angry abiout something
chrysan(15032): about
chrysan(15032): is she seeing someone else?
chrysan(15032): do you know
You: i wish, she wont give me any, but she is obsessivly jealous
chrysan(15032): soemtimes this is key why she is not really part of what you want
chrysan(15032): well the best thing is counselling
chrysan(15032): you can't make this better
You: every time i hit her
You: i feel bad about it
chrysan(15032): and maybe sex with you does not make her happy
You: and we go through the same conversation
You: i try to convince her to go to a shelter
You: she wont
chrysan(15032): anytime you hit a woman she secretly hates you the last thing she wany=ts is for you to touch her
You: then i end up hitting her more
You: i just get soooo mad
chrysan(15032): you do have anger management issues
chrysan(15032): you need to learn to control your temper
chrysan(15032): you guys need counsellinmg
You: no i mean i get mad she wont leave when i hit her
chrysan(15032): do yuo want her to leave
You: i had the idea to hit her about a year ago
You: it just wont work
You: she wont leave
chrysan(15032): so you want her to leave you
You: thats why i hit her
chrysan(15032): you want out of this marriage/
You: but she wont
chrysan(15032): then you are handling it all wrong
You: i need any advice i can get
You: any ideas
You: ?
chrysan(15032): yuo need to be thruthful
chrysan(15032): yuo really need to tell her you don't think this marrige is working out and that you don't want to hurt her but you are not into the marrige
chrysan(15032): she obviously still loves you
chrysan(15032): thats why she is hanging in there
You: your absolutley right
chrysan(15032): you are living a lie
You: you know we were on tv for this may of last year
You: you ever watch nbc?
chrysan(15032): you need dr phil
You: thats what we were on
You: last may
chrysan(15032): yes i do byr i am a flight attendant
chrysan(15032): most of my time is in the skies
You: he said the exact same thing you just said
chrysan(15032): makes sense
chrysan(15032): you are making both your lives unhappy
chrysan(15032): tell her how you feel
chrysan(15032): a new start is never a bad thing
You: your right
You: its time for me to move forward
You: hey
chrysan(15032): you are not helping your life especially if there is kids involved
You: could you find me the number for that rejection line, if it still exists
chrysan(15032): i can search and see what comes up
chrysan(15032): one moment
You: nothing says goodbye
You: like an automated message
chrysan(15032): no its not htere
chrysan(15032): there
You: ty anyway
chrysan(15032): sorry i type too fast
You: thx 4 all the advice
chrysan(15032): please tell her
chrysan(15032): have a great evening
You: u2
chrysan(15032): Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
Status: Session ended.
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In French
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Ring: ...
Ring: ...
Status: Connected to guide: Christine(20974)
Christine(20974): Welcome to ChaCha!
You: avec qui est-ce que tu nage?
Christine(20974): With whom do I swim?
You: oui
Christine(20974): Porquoi, voulez vouz savoir?
You: parce que je t'aime?
Christine(20974): vraiment?
You: c'est vrai
Christine(20974): Qui est-vous?
You: Je suis ton destin
Christine(20974): au revoir
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I am literally rolling around on the floor all crazy-like as I laugh. xD I like the french one *rainbowsmiley*