I saw this crazy guy on TV talking about mailing people free holy water so of course I called the number (1-800-206-9277) hoping for something funny to prank. Unfortunately it was a funny but unresponsive recording that you can listen to by calling that number. Undaunted, I decided to somehow desicrate and make a mockery of the call even if he couldn't hear me. This is what I came up with inside two hours.
http://www.hostmyfile.co.uk/?code=85aa1216fe1b8fc67c9967ca7cf7ed5c