Just thought I'd share, I'm not to exciting or adventurous.
My girlfriend used to like me to take her out shopping. What a frack'n drag that is. She would, like, want me to spend my money on her and crap. So one day I was all F this S and took a pocket full of firecrackers with me. As we walked around the lingerie section of JC Penny I would light and drop one of my firecrackers. I gave myself a few seconds by giving them obscenely long fuses. It only took three of these before she was onto me, she was kinda dumb like that. Anyway, she got all pissed and we left. On the way home she was all huffy so I was like S my D. She did, and everything was better between us.
And there was this one time, on the voice bridge, there was this guy baconstrips and he pissed me off. So all the time I would call in when he wasn't there and be like "Heey guuy, I'm baconstrips and I want to ess your dee" *with a lisp* And they would be all like "fag". I talked to baconstrips later and he called me a motherhumper.
Follow ups:
TPhreak broke up with his girlfriend and consequently got banned from JC Penny for pulling the same crap twice.
baconstrips is still a fag.