Crazy Fat Guy

[z3wb]

So there's this really fat guy that lives down the street who is driving the entire neighborhood crazy. The woman next door to him claims he is drilling holes in his fence and trying to spy on her. Now, this woman is a paranoid schizophrenic, so at first I thought she was just imagining it, but now I'm actually starting to believe her. This fat fuck has called the police on me and/or my friends on several occasions. Every year, on the 4th of July, he sits outside with his phone out and reports anyone he sees lighting fireworks to the police. Every 4th of July has been ruined by this man, and he is partially responsible for the confiscation of hundreds upon hundreds of dollars worth of fireworks. I'm trying to think of a way to get back at him for years of narcing on everyone and making everyone's life a living hell. I'm thinking about just calling him repeatedly every day from Skype or FWD and pretending to be a telemarketer. Maybe after I get tired of calling him, I can record myself saying "Hello, this is Gary from PLA Weekly and we're offering some great deals on magazine subscriptions blah blah blah" and setting something up to randomly call him and play the recording.

[Tachyon]

Get an aluminum tube and make a rocket launcher, then use some fireworks to destroy his house!

[rbcp]

You need to find a relative/friend's house to celebrate July 4th with.

You could do the yellow pages prank, where you call up every business in town and set up appointments with them at the exact same time to the guy's house.

Or use caller ID spoofing to make calls to all your neighbors from that guy.  Try to impersonate his voice and yell at them all for inane stuff.  Like maybe, "This is _____ across the street and I'm sick of your fucking hedges not being trimmed!  If you don't trim them, I'm going to sneak over there tonight and trim them for you."  Yeah, bad example, but you get the idea. 

[M-26-7]

Seems there's a pretty obivious solution to all this. Go over to his house at night with a hand powered drill and drill some holes. Say you heard grunting and furious movements coming from outside his house and you're worried he might have attacked. Make sure his away when you do this and make sure your call is as anonymouss as possible. Be specific about the location of the grunting, so that when the cops pull their glocks and check around the house they'll be sure to investigate that area. You may need to plant some other stuff around the holes to make their purpose clear. If you wanted to get creative you could plant some camera looking at here house with tapes in them of her naked, but that would get complicated and be dangerous for you.

[Lestan Gregor]

Seems there's a pretty obivious solution to all this. Go over to his house at night with a hand powered drill and drill some holes. Say you heard grunting and furious movements coming from outside his house and you're worried he might have attacked. Make sure his away when you do this and make sure your call is as anonymouss as possible. Be specific about the location of the grunting, so that when the cops pull their glocks and check around the house they'll be sure to investigate that area. You may need to plant some other stuff around the holes to make their purpose clear. If you wanted to get creative you could plant some camera looking at here house with tapes in them of her naked, but that would get complicated and be dangerous for you.

SWATting anyone?

[MIB]

Here's some ideas from various texfiles from &totse. Some of these are outdated, others can be modified.

Love Thy Neighbor

Frame Someone Using the SPCA, Press, & Cops


How to get back at the asshole next door -- Using grease

Salting a lawn

Here's some from the Avenger's Front Page

Neighbor Revenge

Lawn Revenge

As always when executing any revenge schemes allways follow George Hayduke"s Ten Commandments of Revenge

Don't forget read and/or utilize tricks in PLA issue 3

MIB

[Jay-D]

Put raw chicken breasts in his laundry dryer vent... The stench would be unbearable and not very easy to locate where it's coming from.

[z3wb]

Make sure his away when you do this...

That's the problem. He is unemployed and always at home, usually sitting out in his garage.

[M-26-7]

Make sure his away when you do this...

That's the problem. He is unemployed and always at home, usually sitting out in his garage.

OK, then it's plan two I guess.
Step one: USP (loaded)
Step two: Silencer
Step three: Pull trigger of USP while pointing it at neighbor
Step four: Put on nightvision googles

[MIB]

That's the problem. He is unemployed and always at home, usually sitting out in his garage.

Is the garage door the remote control type? If so, you can program another door opener to open and close the door.

Another trick is to put an ad in the newspaper announcing a garage/yard sale. Something like Antiques electronics, name your price must sell all. Leaving country soon. Starts at 7am.

The early birds will be at his door at 6am.

MIB

[Robert_]

That's the problem. He is unemployed and always at home, usually sitting out in his garage.

Is the garage door the remote control type? If so, you can program another door opener to open and close the door.

Another trick is to put an ad in the newspaper announcing a garage/yard sale. Something like Antiques electronics, name your price must sell all. Leaving country soon. Starts at 7am.

The early birds will be at his door at 6am.

MIB

You could also use craigslist for this. Save you from having to spend money to post an ad.

[awsomeperson]

you can also get the Mormon missionaries down to his house to give him a Mormon bible. They actually SEND the nuns down to the house. I did this to my neighbor, and he got pissed off. Once the get his information, they will not leave him alone. I feel kinda bad about tricking nuns though...

http://www.mormon.org/holybible

[Tachyon]

Fuck those guys are annoying. Back a few years ago I made the mistake of ordering this stupid jesus tape off them (I figured I could record over it and get a free tape) and they're still calling and visiting me to this day.

[rogueclown]

i'm assuming you know his name...and even if you don't, you at least know his address.  more persistent and annoying than the Mormons are the Scientologists.  i don't see a way to deploy Volunteer Ministers to his house, but you can always go here and enter his mailing information, and even his phone number if you have it.

[Tachyon]

Of you could make some leaflets about Xenu and sign them with his name, then drop them all over town (and one at your local Org of course). Then they'll show  up outside his house with signs saying he's a child molester.