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Author Topic: Newbie Prank Caller Calls Christian Help Hotline.  (Read 5384 times)

Offline Teh Lime

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Newbie Prank Caller Calls Christian Help Hotline.
« on: July 20, 2006, 10:52:25 AM »
Today I have found out what I really want to be when I grow up: A prank caller. Yes, it took me 14 WHOLE YEARS to find that out.

Okay, so as I was saying, I called website/organization of "goody-two shoes Christians" (Read: Neo-Nazis) who are all about "keeping the family together" and being complete, homphobic, closeminded asses. (Their website.) My friend found their contact page, so I thought it'd be fun to call them. The first time I called, I hung up because I was too nervous. The second time, however, I managed to say something:


"Hello, thanks for calling, this is Call A Family. I am Chris. How may I help you?"
"I have a question."
"Yes, what is it?"
"Does anyone at Call A Family masturbate loudly?"
"... I'm sorry, what was your question?"
"OHNOTHINGGOTTAGOBYE! *hangs up*"

Woot. I'm going to call them a few more times~

(Also, no offence to most Christians. I'm just having fun with this.)
« Last Edit: July 20, 2006, 10:54:11 AM by Teh Lime »
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Offline Evelliathaan10111

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Re: Newbie Prank Caller Calls Christian Help Hotline.
« Reply #1 on: July 20, 2006, 06:03:19 PM »
My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself. nice profession choice :) but ur gunna need a little work. I like ur choice of  target though, ne1 that treats others less deserves that kind of stuff in my opinion. Call back a couple times and find out when chris isnt there(this prolly shooldnt be done from ur fone if they have caller id)cuz chris will know ur PhUxxiN6 with him. Find sum1 else that works there to prank sum1 that dosnt know wat ur trying to do. And practice ur pranx b4 calling like into a tape recorder or another fone to make sure u have the prank. Try to sound serious and try hard not to laff, cuz then they will know wat ur doing.Thats prolly the best advice i have 4 u. ;D
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Offline linear

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Re: Newbie Prank Caller Calls Christian Help Hotline.
« Reply #2 on: July 20, 2006, 06:48:58 PM »
your technique sucks. but it reminds me of a shitty article i wrote when i was probably as young and just as stupid as you (hence the article being ridiculously dumb).

http://www.phonelosers.org/upl/upl014.html

It's a prank call primer. So you know, advice for idiots who don't know how to prank call.
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Offline BaconStrips

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Re: Newbie Prank Caller Calls Christian Help Hotline.
« Reply #3 on: July 21, 2006, 12:28:56 AM »
A wise career choice my friend  ;D
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Offline Devilz212

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Re: Newbie Prank Caller Calls Christian Help Hotline.
« Reply #4 on: July 21, 2006, 07:56:32 PM »
It takes time becoming comfterble with talking on the phone, let alone prank calling. Just practice :).
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Offline frog

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Re: Newbie Prank Caller Calls Christian Help Hotline.
« Reply #5 on: July 22, 2006, 12:48:22 AM »
Quote from: Evelliathaan10111 on July 20, 2006, 06:03:19 PM
My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself. nice profession choice :) but ur gunna need a little work. I like ur choice of  target though, ne1 that treats others less deserves that kind of stuff in my opinion. Call back a couple times and find out when chris isnt there(this prolly shooldnt be done from ur fone if they have caller id)cuz chris will know ur PhUxxiN6 with him. Find sum1 else that works there to prank sum1 that dosnt know wat ur trying to do. And practice ur pranx b4 calling like into a tape recorder or another fone to make sure u have the prank. Try to sound serious and try hard not to laff, cuz then they will know wat ur doing.Thats prolly the best advice i have 4 u. ;D

I CAN'T READ WHAT YOU WRITE.
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Offline Evelliathaan10111

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Re: Newbie Prank Caller Calls Christian Help Hotline.
« Reply #6 on: July 22, 2006, 07:14:59 PM »
Quote from: frog on July 22, 2006, 12:48:22 AM
Quote from: Evelliathaan10111 on July 20, 2006, 06:03:19 PM
My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself. nice profession choice :) but ur gunna need a little work. I like ur choice of  target though, ne1 that treats others less deserves that kind of stuff in my opinion. Call back a couple times and find out when chris isnt there(this prolly shooldnt be done from ur fone if they have caller id)cuz chris will know ur PhUxxiN6 with him. Find sum1 else that works there to prank sum1 that dosnt know wat ur trying to do. And practice ur pranx b4 calling like into a tape recorder or another fone to make sure u have the prank. Try to sound serious and try hard not to laff, cuz then they will know wat ur doing.Thats prolly the best advice i have 4 u. ;D

I CAN'T READ WHAT YOU WRITE.

sorry im just used to typing like that... =S
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Offline Saint

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Re: Newbie Prank Caller Calls Christian Help Hotline.
« Reply #7 on: July 23, 2006, 08:51:09 PM »
James Dobson?!?!  *sneeze*

Sorry I think I'm allergic to Focus on the Family.


Quote
The toll free phone number is (800) A-FAMILY (232-6459).  The toll line is (719) 531-3400.

Postal mail–including product requests, letters, and donations–can be sent to:
Focus on the Family
(street address not required)
Colorado Springs, CO  80995

Our toll-free phone number is (800) A-FAMILY (232-6459). Our toll number is (719) 531-3400.

Fax
(719) 531-3424

Web Help
Call the 800 number and ask for extension 6090 to request help with one of our Web sites. Assistance is available Monday-Friday 8 a.m. - 4 p.m. Mountain time.

Visitor Information
Call (719) 531-3328, or go to our online information about visiting and touring Focus.

Counseling Department
Call (719) 531-3400, ext. 7700, Monday-Friday 9 a.m. - 4:30 p.m. Mountain time.

Telephone Device for the Deaf (TDD)
(877) 877-0503 or (719) 548-4601

Stewardship Ministry
Call (800) 782-8227 (ask for Stewardship), or (719) 548-5839.

For information about Focus on the Family conferences, call (800) 232-6459 Monday-Friday 8 a.m. - 4 p.m. Mountain time.

I love the catchphrase that the company that does their website uses: "With Right now, you don't have to make a deal with the devil"  ;D  Hehe!
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Offline beerfuck

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Re: Newbie Prank Caller Calls Christian Help Hotline.
« Reply #8 on: July 26, 2006, 09:22:42 PM »
Why, again, did you bother posting this?

When I was 14, I used to call random people and hold my battery-operated-laugh-box up the phone, which produced funnier calls than this one.

Relax and have more fun with it than immediately spouting off insults or profanity. Impersonate some entity of importantance. Be a radio DJ, police officer, the devil, etc. String them along as long as you can. And record it. Audio will take you a lot further than transcripts in your 'career'. Have fun
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CountyKid

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Re: Newbie Prank Caller Calls Christian Help Hotline.
« Reply #9 on: July 29, 2006, 09:00:37 PM »
You don't have to post a thread everytime you do something.

  Like, calling me or prank calling someone.
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Offline Raptor

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Re: Newbie Prank Caller Calls Christian Help Hotline.
« Reply #10 on: July 30, 2006, 03:56:12 PM »
OMG NEW THREAD: "I CAME HOME TODAY AND TURNED ON MY COMPUTER, THEN I WENT ON SKYPE My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself.!!!1
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Offline ryanfido

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Re: Newbie Prank Caller Calls Christian Help Hotline.
« Reply #11 on: August 02, 2006, 11:34:24 PM »
Quote from: Devilz212 on July 21, 2006, 07:56:32 PM
It takes time becoming comfterble with talking on the phone, let alone prank calling. Just practice :).

most definately. its all about your charisma.

i'm like +13124 charisma
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