Author Topic: Some funny jokes  (Read 3945 times)

KernMilestone

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Some funny jokes
« on: February 05, 2009, 03:19:50 AM »
The Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.


Sorry if an old one - but very very funny.
« Last Edit: February 18, 2009, 09:26:36 PM by rbcp »

Offline Arox!

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Re: Some funny jokes
« Reply #1 on: February 05, 2009, 03:49:01 PM »
My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself. My ass has fallen off due to laughter.
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Offline N3gativ3sanity

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Re: Some funny jokes
« Reply #2 on: February 05, 2009, 04:08:24 PM »
I am now laughing and it's out loud because what was said previously is so funny. My ass has fallen off due to laughter.

You're making it hard to not hate you. And I hate with hammers.
S1acker: wtf do they wanna take my plasma for
Negs: For people in the hospital, I guess
S1acker: they can get their own
S1acker: GO GROW SOME PLASMA NOOBS!!!!

Offline m0rdekai

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Re: Some funny jokes
« Reply #3 on: February 05, 2009, 06:10:56 PM »
I am now laughing and it's out loud because what was said previously is so funny. My ass has fallen off due to laughter.

You're making it hard to not hate you. And I hate with hammers.
MOAR HAMMERS!!1!11!one

Careful Nod.  He's just a very clever spambot. 

Your moms a spambot.

Offline Magus

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Re: Some funny jokes
« Reply #4 on: February 05, 2009, 11:47:52 PM »
Hey! That wasn't SOME funny jokes. That was ONE barely funny joke :(

Offline Nod

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Re: Some funny jokes
« Reply #5 on: February 06, 2009, 12:11:37 AM »
Hey! That wasn't SOME funny jokes. That was ONE barely funny joke :(

Magus can make decent posts. Why doesn't he do so more often?

This thread is now a Magus intervention. Sebastian, sit down. We need to talk.
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Offline Arox!

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Re: Some funny jokes
« Reply #6 on: February 06, 2009, 07:24:11 PM »
I am now laughing and it's out loud because what was said previously is so funny. My ass has fallen off due to laughter.

You're making it hard to not hate you. And I hate with hammers.
So... does that mean you wanna hammer me?
L̬͙O͓Ḽ̼͔̭̯

Offline N3gativ3sanity

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Re: Some funny jokes
« Reply #7 on: February 06, 2009, 07:58:31 PM »
I am now laughing and it's out loud because what was said previously is so funny. My ass has fallen off due to laughter.

You're making it hard to not hate you. And I hate with hammers.
So... does that mean you wanna hammer me?

Yes, but not in the "oh Arox, I wanna give it to you from behind" way that I'm sure you crave.

I don't want to sully my strap-on with the likes of you.
S1acker: wtf do they wanna take my plasma for
Negs: For people in the hospital, I guess
S1acker: they can get their own
S1acker: GO GROW SOME PLASMA NOOBS!!!!

Offline Nod

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Re: Some funny jokes
« Reply #8 on: February 07, 2009, 01:04:49 AM »
This thread sucks and  can not be saved..
I HATE the bridge.
Meme Roth is a Food Nazi Cunt

Offline m0rdekai

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Re: Some funny jokes
« Reply #9 on: February 08, 2009, 08:24:29 PM »
This thread sucks and  can not be saved..
BANHAMMERBANHAMMERBANHAMMERBANHAMMER

Careful Nod.  He's just a very clever spambot. 

Your moms a spambot.

Offline dennisr

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Re: Some funny jokes
« Reply #10 on: February 11, 2009, 08:58:43 PM »
A priest, a minister and a guru sat discussing the best positions for
prayer, while a telephone repairman worked nearby.

“Kneeling is definitely the best way to pray,” the priest said.

“No,” said the minister. “I get the best results standing with my hands outstretched to Heaven.”

“You’re both wrong,” the guru said. “The most effective prayer
position is lying down on the floor.”

The repairman could contain himself no longer. “Hey, fellas,” he interrupted. “The best prayin’ I ever did was when I was hangin’ upside down from a telephone pole.”

Offline liife

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Re: Some funny jokes
« Reply #11 on: February 11, 2009, 10:58:21 PM »
I don't get it.
It looks like you got hit in the face with that egg and you want to eat it too.

Offline Magus

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Re: Some funny jokes
« Reply #12 on: February 12, 2009, 04:59:50 AM »
I don't get it.
Some kind of sex joke, I think.

Offline Nod

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Re: Some funny jokes
« Reply #13 on: February 12, 2009, 09:54:52 PM »
This thread still sucks.
I HATE the bridge.
Meme Roth is a Food Nazi Cunt

Offline Arox!

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Re: Some funny jokes
« Reply #14 on: February 13, 2009, 09:48:55 AM »
* Q: If a doctor carries a black bag and a plumber carries a toolbox, what does a mohel carry?
* A: A Bris-kit!

A man who has finally made it in business treats himself to a new Lamborghini. After buying it, he feels guilty so he goes to the Orthodox Rabbi and asks for a mezuzah for the Lamborghini.

"You want a mezuzah for what?" the Rabbi asks.

"It's a Lamborghini,"

"What's a Lamborghini?" asks the Rabbi.

"A sports car."

"What? That's blasphemy!" the Rabbi shouts. "You want a mezuzah for a sports car? Go to the Conservatives!"

Well, the man is disappointed, but goes to the Conservative Rabbi and asks for a mezuzah.

"You want a mezuzah for what?" the Rabbi asks.

"For my Lamborghini", the man replies.

"What's a Lamborghini?" asks the Rabbi.

"A car, a sports car."

"What kind of sports car?" asks the Rabbi.

"Italian."

"What? That is blasphemy!" the Rabbi shouts. "You want a mezuzah for a Goyishe car? Go to the Reform!"

Again, the man feels guilty and disappointed, but goes to the Reform Rabbi.

"Rabbi," he asks, "I'd like a mezuzah for my Lamborghini."

"You have a Lamborghini?" asks the Rabbi.

"You know what it is?" says the man.

"Of course! It's a fantastic Italian sports car. What's a mezuzah?"

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