I thought, surely there must be a treasure trove of customer info on their FB page... but no.. only 1 person likes The Burns Team
If you can get her number, call her and say since she was the first person to "Like" them, The Burns Team wants to show their appreciation by giving her 3 free carpet cleaning sessions. The problem is tapping their PBX box when she calls in.
Her: What do you mean I don't free carpet cleaning? Some guy called me yesterday.
Then: I don't know what you're talking about.
Her: Well SCREW YOU!
Alternately call and tell them you just purchased a hotel franchise. And you want to keep the hotel clean for your guest. Tell them you want the entire hotel cleaned. Make sure you tell them money is no object and name their price.
After they get their hopes up, give them an address for an abandoned building or a local Walmart.
Come to think of it, if Dex or any copycat trashes a hotel by proxy, you can call the Burns Team to clean the carpet that got messed.
You gotta even the balance somehow.
MIB