ChaCha search

[MattGSX]

Was that before or after you were banned?

[MattGSX]

Status: Connected to guide: LisaR
LisaR: Welcome to ChaCha!
LisaR: Hi there
You: Hi Lisa
LisaR: What is it you are searching for?
You: the organization phone losers of America
You: not their main site
You: but sites that have other info about it
LisaR: Well let me see if I can find that
You: I have one more search for you
LisaR: What is that?
You: How can I kill a zombie with my bare hands?
You: ;-)
LisaR: Funny, guess you were my last search
You: Nope
You: I was the one who searched the first time
You: I just save all my conversations, because I am a stalker
LisaR: Well I already know the answer that you can't do it, so any other searches today
You: Is Lisa your real first name, or a pseudonym?
LisaR: Ah probably
LisaR: It is my real name
You: Is there a hearing impaired version of ChaCha?
You: er...
You: vision impaired
LisaR: Well uuummm no hearing impaired
You: whichever would allow me to make hilarious prank calls
You: And I'm talking HILARIOUS
LisaR: But I suppose if you change your settings for your system it could make it easier for people with vision problems to see
You: No, I mean, people that I could talk to on the phone about retrieving stuff for me
LisaR: Ha, no they don't have that
You: You should read this:
You: http://www.phonelosers.org/forums/index.php?action=who
LisaR: Uhoh another forum?
You: not just any forum
You: I think you're mentioned in it
LisaR: I will check it out
You: wiat
You: one sec
You: http://www.phonelosers.org/forums/index.php?topic=882.0
You: that's the exact address.
You: Give me one sec.
You: I promise I'll give you a high rating
You: There. Read the second page of the second link I sent you
You: You should register for the PLA forums
You: you'd like it
You: And you can post your funny ChaCha logs
You: I'm going to find another guide to harass, though
You: Seeya
You: You should end this so I can rate you
You: HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY
You: HEY
You: HEY
You: HEY
You: CACTUS
You: CACTUS
You: BUTTFUCKER CHICKEN MONGER
You: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER
LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER)
You: Got your attention?
You: CHICKENFUCKER ASSMONGING MONGLOID MONGLE
You: ASS ASS ASS ASS ASS
You: ASS ASS
You: ASS
You: ASS
You: ASS
You: VIOLENT RAPE
You: LISA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You: FUCK FUCK FUCK
LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (FUCK FUCK FUCK)
You: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER
LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER)
You: NIGGER
LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER)
You: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck)
You: isaR: What is that? You: How can I kill a zombie with my bare hands? You: ;-) LisaR: Funny, guess you were my last search You: Nope You: I was the one who searched the first time You: I just save all my conversations, because I am a stalker LisaR: Well I already know the answer that you can't do it, so any other searches today You: Is Lisa your real first name, or a pseudonym? LisaR: Ah probably LisaR: It is my real name You: Is there a hearing impaired version of ChaCha? You: er... You: vision impaired LisaR: Well uuummm no hearing impaired You: whichever would allow me to make hilarious prank calls You: And I'm talking HILARIOUS LisaR: But I suppose if you change your settings for your system it could make it easier for people with vision problems to see You: No, I mean, people that I could talk to on the phone about retrieving stuff for me LisaR: Ha, no they don't have that You: You should read this: You: http://www.phonelosers.org/forums/index.php?action=who LisaR: Uhoh another forum? You: not just any forum You: I think you're mentioned in it LisaR: I will check it out You: wiat You: one sec You: http://www.phonelosers.org/forums/index.php?topic=882.0 You: that's the exact address. You: Give me one sec. You: I promise I'll give you a high rating You: There. Read the second page of the second link I sent you You: You should register for the PLA forums You: you'd like it You: And you can post your funny ChaCha logs You: I'm going to find another guide to harass, though You: Seeya You: You should end this so I can rate you You: HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY You: HEY You: HEY You: HEY You: CACTUS You: CACTUS You: BUTTFUCKER CHICKEN MONGER You: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER) You: Got your attention? You: CHICKENFUCKER ASSMONGING MONGLOID MONGLE You: ASS ASS ASS ASS ASS You: ASS ASS You: ASS You: ASS You: ASS You: VIOLENT RAPE You: LISA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You: FUCK FUCK FUCK LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (FUCK FUCK FUCK) You: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER) You: NIGGER LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER) You: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck)
LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (isaR: What is that? You: How can I kill a zombie with my bare hands? You: ;-) LisaR: Funny, guess you were my last search You: Nope You: I was the one who searched the first time You: I just save all my conversations, because I am a stalker LisaR: Well I already know the answer that you can't do it, so any other searches today You: Is Lisa your real first name, or a pseudonym? LisaR: Ah probably LisaR: It is my real name You: Is there a hearing impaired version of ChaCha? You: er... You: vision impaired LisaR: Well uuummm no hearing impaired You: whichever would allow me to make hilarious prank calls You: And I'm talking HILARIOUS LisaR: But I suppose if you change your settings for your system it could make it easier for people with vision problems to see You: No, I mean, people that I could talk to on the phone about retrieving stuff for me LisaR: Ha, no they don't have that You: You should read this: You: http://www.phonelosers.org/forums/index.php?action=who LisaR: Uhoh another forum? You: not just any forum You: I think you're mentioned in it LisaR: I will check it out You: wiat You: one sec You: http://www.phonelosers.org/forums/index.php?topic=882.0 You: that's the exact address. You: Give me one sec. You: I promise I'll give you a high rating You: There. Read the second page of the second link I sent you You: You should register for the PLA forums You: you'd like it You: And you can post your funny ChaCha logs You: I'm going to find another guide to harass, though You: Seeya You: You should end this so I can rate you You: HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY You: HEY You: HEY You: HEY You: CACTUS You: CACTUS You: BUTTFUCKER CHICKEN MONGER You: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER) You: Got your attention? You: CHICKENFUCKER ASSMONGING MONGLOID MONGLE You: ASS ASS ASS ASS ASS You: ASS ASS You: ASS You: ASS You: ASS You: VIOLENT RAPE You: LISA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You: FUCK FUCK FUCK LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (FUCK FUCK FUCK) You: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER) You: NIGGER LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (NIGGER) You: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck))
You: Fucking ban me?
LisaR: !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (Fucking ban me?)
You: DO SOMETHING
You: DO SOMETHING
You: DO SOMETHING
You: DO SOMETHING
You: DO SOMETHING
You: KILL ME
You: KILL ME
You: KILL ME
You: DRUGS AND CHILDREN
You: sex and minors



I'm pretty sure she was busy reading it and not listening to me, or just enjoying everything I was saying.

or reporting all our conversations. I dunno.

[rbcp]

Was that before or after you were banned?

I'm unbanned now.  Guess it was just temporary.

[silentneep]

They must be getting hit hard by us tonight... they didn't even give me a chance.

Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: JasonR
JasonR: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi Jason
JasonR: What can I find for you?
You: tigger vs batman. I want to know who would win
You: in a fight
Transfer: You are being transfered to another guide who can help you search even better!
Looking for guide ...
Status: Guide not located.
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: AlyssaB
AlyssaB: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi
AlyssaB: Hello there
AlyssaB: What can I help you find about Tigger and Batman?
You: I want to know who would win
You: like, in a fight
AlyssaB: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.

[MattGSX]

I bet they're all reading the PLA forums seeing their names in print.

[frog]

That was fun.

Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: DeniseA
DeniseA: Welcome to ChaCha!
DeniseA: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
You: hi
You: i want to know about making my computer better
You: like faster and stuff
DeniseA: What kind of computer do you have now?
DeniseA: Is it Windows or Mac? What version operating system?
You: its kind of old. its windows 98
You: something by compact or something
You: i was wondering where i could download upgrades
DeniseA: Okay, let me see what I can find.
You: i know there are "illegal" sites but are there legal ones where i can download upgrades???
DeniseA: This may help you decide if it's worth upgrading.
You: like, megahertz upgrades
DeniseA: Well, you can things that can help with the function of your system...
DeniseA: But, it is a system that is no longer supported by Microsoft.
You: but it functions good. i just want it to be faster
DeniseA: Have you considered upgrading RAM memory?
You: i dont know what that is
DeniseA: Let me find you some info on that.
You: ok, ram upgrade souns good
You: where can i download that??
You: is there a webesiter?
DeniseA: It's fairly cheap, but it's a piece of hardware you have to buy and have someone put in your computer.
You: so id have to buy a cd to get it?
You: a ram cd
DeniseA: No, it's like a chip -- or a board.
You: i have to replace the whole board, computer board?
DeniseA: Well, how old is your computer?
You: well its windows 98, so probably from 1998 My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself.
You: 8 years??
DeniseA: oogle.com
DeniseA: Sorry --
You: its ok
DeniseA: Honestly, the things you can do to make it faster, like Ram, would cost very little.....but a used computer would too.
DeniseA: If virus, etc. start to popup in Windows 98, Microsoft no longer supports any upgrades to the system.
You: a new computer would be bettter than used , tho, right?
DeniseA: Oh, yes -- and Dell has some reasonably priced ones.
DeniseA: Let me take you to that site.
DeniseA: Or, even, WalMart or local stores like that.
You: walmart has computesr?
DeniseA: Yes, and you can buy them online, too.
You: no, i think instore would be better
You: can you find me some links on how to steal?
DeniseA: You went through 11 minutes and did very good
DeniseA: Do you want to end now or would you like for me to end it now?
You: thanks i haxx like a pro
You: PRO HAXX
You: HAXX
DeniseA: You were good -- had me going for a long time.
You: HAXX
You: HAXX
You: HAXX
You: HAXX
You: HAXX
DeniseA: HOOOOOOO HOOOOOO HOOOOO
You: PRO HAXX YOU'D
You: YOU WAS PRO HAXXDDDD
DeniseA: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.

[PHISH-PHREAK]

Damn it I had a good one but the I got that stupid "abusive action" screen

[silentneep]

I was grinning the whole time waiting to deilver this punchline.

Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: JeannieR
JeannieR: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi
JeannieR: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
You: I'm looking for the big dipper in relation to the little dipper
JeannieR: Please clarify your search
JeannieR: Sure just a moment
You: Any luck?
JeannieR: still searching
You: Hmm... these seem to be about stars
JeannieR: The big and little dipper are stars
You: no... I'm looking for utensils
JeannieR: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
Status: Session ended.

[silentneep]

Here's a good idea I had that I couldn't make work

My goal here was to try to get the chick to feel sorry for me and describe duckjob.wav to me.  Feel free to try this for a better response than the cold-hearted Christine...

Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: ChristineG
ChristineG: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi, thanks
ChristineG: What exactly are you looking for tonight?
ChristineG: Hi.
You: I'm trying to find some joke my friends keep telling me about
ChristineG: Ok...I can see if I can find it.
You: it's called like, duck jobs or duck job or something
ChristineG: So I think you need to explain this more.
You: Well, I think it's like a sound file or something... but I'm deaf. And I can't get them to explain it to me
You: they just tell me it's funny but I wouldn't understand
You: So I'm hoping to find something that will explain it
ChristineG: Well then I suppose that I can't help either.
ChristineG: I am only here to find web sites for you.
ChristineG: Sorry.
You: Well I was hoping the duck job might be on a website somewhere
ChristineG: It is but there is no explaination for it and I know that you wont be able to hear it...so I dont have any information for you.
ChristineG: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.

The worst part is, if you google "duck job" you get a description in the second hit, proving how google's algorithm is superior even to actual intelligence.

[Raptor]

Fun times searching for help upgrading an ancient mac to mac os x. (These were practically out before I was born)

Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: DorisP
DorisP: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi
DorisP: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
DorisP: hi
DorisP: what is a mac quadra?
You: I need to figure out how to make this computer run faster
You: thats the type of PC I have
DorisP: let me transfer you to another guide that hopefully know more about this subject than I do...
DorisP: I know nothing about making computers go faster,,,
DorisP: my transfer button will not work for some reason
You: oh noes!
DorisP: oh yes..
DorisP: none of them work at the moment...
You: How about the Power Macintosh 6100...
DorisP: I apologize if it causes you an inconvenience
DorisP: I know nothing but let me see if I can find some sites that might help you...
DorisP: I will give it my best
DorisP: how about free mac tec support?
You: They don't support this one anymore for some reason
DorisP: ohhhhhh sorry..
DorisP: info from answers..that might help some
You: I need to figure out how to get OS X Loaded on to either my Quadra or Macintosh LC
DorisP: let me try that transfer button again
DorisP: I suggest you try a new search...
DorisP: sorry I could not help you...I am useless when it comes to this subject..
You: ok
DorisP: sorry..
Status: Session ended.
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: MariaP
MariaP: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hello
MariaP: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
You: I have a computer question
MariaP: What exactly is your question?
You: I need to figure out how to get OS X Loaded on to either my Quadra or my Power Macintosh 9500
MariaP: searching...
You: how do I do that?
MariaP: searching...
MariaP: Located info. yet unable to send results, please be patient as I transfer you to another guide..
Transfer: You are being transfered to another guide who can help you search even better!
Looking for guide ...
Status: Guide not located.
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: AMYB
AMYB: Welcome to ChaCha!
You: Hi
You: I need help with my computer
AMYB: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
You: making it go faster
AMYB: ok
You: its a power macintosh 9600
AMYB: ok just a moment
AMYB: you can order upgrades off that page
You: is there any software?
You: I need to figure out how to get OS X Loaded on to it
You: any ideas?
AMYB: well that last site i sent you has ways to make you pc run faster
You: you didn't send me any sites
AMYB: why wont it let you load it?
You: maby its hacked by the PLA or something
AMYB: hmm they must not be going through hold on
You: other guides had alot of trouble too
AMYB: do you see the results now?
You: nope. I only see the word" cactus" blinking under Guide Results
You: is that supposed to happen?
AMYB: no
Transfer: You are being transfered to another guide who can help you search even better!
Looking for guide ...
Status: Guide not located.

[fluffy_phreak]

JeannieR: The big and little dipper are stars

   the big and little dipper are constellations not stars My own mediocre attempt at humor has been highly amusing to myself.

how does this site make enough money to pay thousands of guides ?

[silentneep]

Ads.

[Colonel Panic]

Search on "pranks on chacha guides"

...

Here's the links she gave me:

http://forum.abestweb.com/showthread.php?s=218fa33d2963385788fccdb8533d0e0b&p=634308#post634308
http://forums.sohh.com/showthread.php?t=784361&page=9
http://www.somethingawful.com/spam/
http://www.pbnation.com/showthread.php?t=1872475

That's awesome. I can't believe she gave you a link to something awful forums!

_________________________________________________________

OK here's another one

Search terms: abortion clinic doctors


Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: sherryh
sherryh: Welcome to ChaCha!
sherryh: Hello what state
You: Thank you, may the Lord bless you and your family on this holiday season
sherryh: Thank you
You: I am looking for a doctor
You: a doctor who manages or runs an abortion clinic
You: like a director?

<long pause>

You: Hello, are you still there?
sherryh: Yes
You: Oh praise Jesus
You: I was praying that somethign bad hadn't happened to you
You: ok I need to find the names of doctors who manage, direct or own abotrionj clinics
sherryh: no he hit me with a bolt of lighting, but im ok
You: Have you accepted Jesus as your own pewrsonal Lord and Savior?
You: I am asking because as another child of God I am concerned for your immortal soul
sherryh: yes, he know me very well...
You: Praise Jesus
You: I am so happy to hear that we are on the same page
You: I feel I can talk to you freely
You: OK well the information I need is
You: I heard there is a website
You: a list of abortion clinic owners and directors
You: can you help me find it?
You: it's a good Christian website
sherryh: why are you going to blow it up
You: please don't suggest such things
You: that's terrible!
sherryh: i was just wondering
You: well don't you know that the FBI monitor internet communications?
sherryh: most christians blow them up
sherryh: i think they heard
You: can you help me finjd this website?
sherryh: ok
You: I believe the webmasters name is a reverend joseph krupp or something like that

<sends links to news reports about abortion clinic bombings>

You: hmmm... no that's not it
You: this is more of a homepage
sherryh: Heres enjoyable reading

<sends link to FBI.gov>

You: This Reverend Krupp is a righteous Christian soldier
sherryh: is he for real?

<sends links to stories about a confessed abortion clinic murderer>

You: The FBI, the freemasons and the Jews are an evil cabal of Satan worshippers
You: it's true but you won't find that on their website
sherryh: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
Status: Session ended.

[fluffy_phreak]

Ads.

can they really turn a profit and pay so many guides with just ads ? it doesnt seem like theres really any excess of them.

[gangals]

As one guide put it:

You: how's the pay?
 DoreenM: very different from the usual types
 DoreenM: below minimum wage..