Okay, the real topic is:
'If these forums were somehow, magically, scripted into a movie, who would you cast to play the part of yourself?' Answers must be in the form of a living, real person (example: William Shatner-ok, Captain Kirk-fictional/not ok). Explanain your choice if you feel it is necessary. Go.
I think I would choose Tadanobu Asano, but he would have to look and act like Kakihara (minus the facial scars) for the part.