Man this dude is a freaking retard.
I Yahoo IM'd him with the message "Hello? You emailed me"
He responded within seconds, and again he copied and pasted the same pitch lines, with the same grammatical errors intact!
This is the pic he was using for an avatar:
Here's the chat log:
Show Recent Messages (F3)
julianah marley: are you interested in the job offer]
John Albert: maybe. I'm kind of skeptical about such things
John Albert: could you tell me more about it?
julianah marley: SUMMERFIELD
julianah marley: We are looking for a representatives who is based in United States, Someone who his Faithful and Honest who will be helping us recieving payments from our customers based in the states. We are willing to pay $400 or 10% per everypayment you recieve from our clients on our behalf and you can still keep ur regular job while you work as it wouldn't affect your present state of job
John Albert: hmmmm ok
John Albert: what kind of company is it?
John Albert: WOW is that your pic?
julianah marley: yeah
John Albert: Is that really you?
julianah marley: ye
julianah marley: yes
julianah marley: i am working for the rose holding company
John Albert: you didn't copy and paste that from some porno website, did you? Cuz u look HOTTT!!
John Albert: rose holding?
julianah marley: i mean where i am working ok
John Albert: so what are you holding?
John Albert: oops sorry
julianah marley: ok
John Albert: my wireless router cut out for a second there
John Albert: I really need to buy a new one
julianah marley: which one of this check will you be able to cash immediately from yourbank or cashing place immediately.....Money Order....Cashier Cheque....Traveller's Cheque
John Albert: SUMMERFIELD
John Albert: I can cash any kind of check. My bank is teh 1337!
John Albert: is rose holding like some kind of a courier service or something?
julianah marley: it is a company
John Albert: well duh!
julianah marley: Rose Holding Company
julianah marley: ok
John Albert: what does your company hold, if I may ask?
John Albert: If I have to pee, will you hold it for me?
julianah marley: This rural based Company and it's dis ectors are involved in a number of
activities, from I.T. to engineering to agriculture to Lifestyle (Luggage and Clothing) and Tourism. The challenges are: working with small companies and individuals in the 'rural area of Northumberland and Cumbria - offering marketing assistance, management advice and support or, linkage with other UK or International companies, finance and sometimes ...... a life-line
julianah marley: Rose
julianah marley: As soon as you receive any payment from any of our clients,all you need to do is take it to your Bank or a Pawn Shop or a Check Cashing Place around you and have it cashed it,then you going to deduct your $500 or 10% from it and send whatever the remaining to the company based on instruction that will be given to you
John Albert: wow so I could actually be helping people if i sign up for your little racket?
julianah marley: yeah
John Albert: I really do need money for a new router. A 2nd job would be nice
julianah marley: If you are interested i would need you to give me your Full Name,Contact Address,Phone Number and your e-mail address so i can send it to my client and he'll issue and the payment to you I want you to be rest assured that this transaction wouldn't cost you any amount and no tax involved in it
John Albert: who is this client you speak of? I hope she's a cute 'n' sexy, hot 'n' horny teen like yourself!
julianah marley: All you have to do is just to receive payments which will be sent to you through Fedex or UPS courier services from our clients and this doesn't entails any money from you for everything will be arranged by our client
John Albert: yeah, I know the drill. I used to do money laundering all the time, so I'm used to cashing lots of money orders, traveller's checks and cashier's checks
John Albert: I cut the teller in and she makes sure the managers don't get wise
John Albert: She's fucking the bank manager
John Albert: so tell me, are you single or married?
julianah marley: i am single
John Albert: goddamn you serious?
julianah marley: and you
John Albert: well, I'm married but the wife and I have an "open" relationship so yeah
John Albert: I'm... available
John Albert: hey wait a minute...
John Albert: you're not really a guy are you?
julianah marley: you mean you are still seraching
John Albert: cuz I hate that
julianah marley: hey i am real ok
John Albert: when people use the internet to make themselves appear different than they really are
julianah marley: so are you interested in the job offer
John Albert: um, sure
John Albert: could you fax me a contract or something?
julianah marley: so send me all your neccesary information so you could start receiving payment from our clien
julianah marley: clients
John Albert: well, I'd feel better if I had some sort of contract. You know, nothing formal. No need to hire a lawyer just yet. Just some standard Nigerian scammer boilerplate would be fine
julianah marley: what do u mean i dont seems to understand ok
John Albert: oh nothing, just yanking your chain
julianah marley: hey do you know that one of our branch is in Nigeria
John Albert: no way
John Albert: I bet there's some fine-ass African bitches at that branch
John Albert: with big, ripe round onion bootays!
John Albert: so you need my name and bank account number?
julianah marley: nope
julianah marley: i need your full name and contact address your moblie number and email address
John Albert: you wouldn't be taking advantage of a poor, uneducated, lonely middle-aged pervert like me would you?
julianah marley: we will never do that ok
John Albert: cuz I love teh onion bootays but every nice girl I meet online ends up being some kind of a Nigerian scammer or something, trying to get his hands on my substanital inheritance
julianah marley: nope
julianah marley: we can never do that ok
John Albert: ok send me more pics of yourself and I'll gave you my contact info, 'k?
julianah marley: But,the problem we have is trust and honest,But we have our way of getting anyone that have the paln to gets away with our money,such person will be tracked down by the authority.I mean the FBI
John Albert: FBI! Pfffft
John Albert: the FBI couldn't find their own assholes with both hands and a flashlight
John Albert: trust me
John Albert: I know
John Albert: my cousin works for them and he's a fucking idiot
julianah marley: oops ok
John Albert: spends all his time chasing after space aliens and bigfoots
julianah marley: so send me your information needed know and be fast ok
John Albert: you really think I'm Rose Holding material?
julianah marley: hmmmm
John Albert: you never sent me the pics! you tease!
julianah marley: forget about that know i will send you later ok
julianah marley: so lets focus on businees first
John Albert: ok back to business
John Albert: so all I have to do is send you my address and I'll start getting these sweet checks in the mail?
julianah marley: and you will start receiving payment ok
John Albert: how much will these checks be for?
John Albert: I mean, what are we talking about here? Hundreds, thousands, hundreds of thousands?
julianah marley: hey give me the details first and i will tell you the information you need to know ok
John Albert: so where are you located right now?
John Albert: in the UK?
julianah marley: yeah
John Albert: where at?
julianah marley: accrington
John Albert: what's the weather like over there? Cuz here it's hot as a 10-dollar glock
John Albert: and humid like Oprah's asscrack
julianah marley: hey lets face busineess ok
John Albert: ok ok sorry
John Albert: I have ADD
John Albert: but I can't afford my meds
John Albert: life sucks
John Albert: I used to be so happy when I was a kid
John Albert: now all my friends are gone
John Albert: and the only people I ever get to talk to are nigerian scammers on Yahoo IM
julianah marley: hey what is all this do you want to start receiving payment or not
John Albert: hell yeahs I do!!!!
John Albert: $.$
John Albert: and by "payment" you mean, have my email account hacked and my identity stolen along with my sizeable inheritance?
John Albert: cuz let me tell you, money don't buy happiness
John Albert: take it from me
julianah marley: yeah that is true
julianah marley: i really understand
John Albert: do you?
John Albert: I doubt it, It sure sucks being so filthy-ass rich
John Albert: ok I'm through whining like a pussy
John Albert: time to man-up
John Albert: here's my name
julianah marley: maybe if you start receiving payment from us i think we could work things out ok
John Albert: Harry Stinkfinger
John Albert: no just kidding
John Albert: actually its Bob Turkey
julianah marley: k
John Albert: I live at 10 Easy Marks Way
John Albert: Credulous, Rhosse Island
John Albert: sorry
John Albert: Rhode Island
John Albert: my typing skills aren't so good
John Albert: cuz I'm not supposed to drink while taking my meds
julianah marley: ok
John Albert: zip code: 65037821
julianah marley: hey the zip code is invalid ok
John Albert: what?!?
John Albert: no wonder I never get my mail
John Albert: shit
John Albert: my email address is
icantbelieveyourfallingforthis@yourdumbforascammer.comJohn Albert: SUMMERFIELD
julianah marley: you wrong
julianah marley: bye forever
John Albert: bai bai!
julianah marley: you are not serious ok
John Albert: ...
John Albert: I'm serious as ebola, dude
BUZZ!!!John Albert: ooooOOOOOOOooOOOOOOooOOooooo
John Albert: jerkoff
julianah marley has signed out. (6/17/2006 7:53 PM)
<edited 6-17-06 to add the avatar pic><edited 6-19-06 to remove the quote box>